Could be worse... could be raining

A new year, a new lease on life

2012-01-07T23:45:00.000-08:00

In a few short weeks it will have been a year since my surgery. I've done so much healing since then. In order to keep proper perspective, I have to keep reminding myself how bad I felt a year ago. In reflection, I've realized that my body was shutting down last year. It is sobering to come to terms with that reality. But it also fills me with gratitude for the second chance I've gotten to live a full life.

Over the past 5 months, I've tried various adjustments in meds and supplements. I think I've found the right combination... finally.

Interestingly, my increased Vitamin D levels have made my seasonal affective disorder more tolerable this winter. I'm very thankful for that.

With this new lease on life, I wonder what 2012 has in store for me. So many possibilities.

This year I'm looking at freedom from a slightly different perspective

2011-07-04T14:33:00.000-07:00

Today on July 4th (the U.S.'s Independence Day) I'm reflecting on the many freedoms I enjoy. I'm also reflecting on the more personal health-related freedoms I hope to enjoy in the future as my body heals. Ironically, just this last week I had a follow-up Skype appointment with Dr. Cook to discuss my latest blood test results.

I was happy to find out in my appointment with Dr. Cook that my Vitamin D levels have risen to 47 (I was at 10 just prior to surgery). That's a very good sign things are headed in the right direction. However, I wasn't very pleased that my lab results showed my body hasn't responded to the thyroid medication. But Dr. Cook assured me that I had been on a very low dose and the next step was to slowly increase the amount I'm taking daily to try and get results.

I was also pleased to have Dr. Cook tell me that a new physician, Dr. Howard, has just joined his staff at Vital Health Institute. In fact, Dr. Cook said he'd just added Dr. Howard's bio and philosophy to the Vital Health website that very morning. Dr. Cook told me that if after another couple of months my body isn't responding to the meds as he'd like, Dr. Howard would be able to join the case to look at things on an even more granular level.

After my appointment, I headed over to the website to read up on Dr. Howard, an Integrative and Function Medicine physician. I was very intrigued and impressed by his philosophy (click here to read it) as well as his background and credentials (including almost two decades as an ER doc). I feel like I'm in good hands with all the staff at Vital Health, but to have Dr. Howard joining them seemed like an especially choice blessing.

The next day after my appointment, another serendipitous thing happened. A posted link on Facebook led me to a very eye-opening presentation (see below). As I listened, I felt like I was being given me more tools and information to improve my health. I sent the link to Hubby, and after watching the video we decided to spend that evening shopping at two local sources I researched online (Lunardi's and Whole Foods) to purchase organically grown produce and organically produced dairy and meat products including one of my favorite foods and calcium sources, cheese. My life would seem very bleak without cheese. Because of my past issues with an eating disorder, eating is often more of a chore or a "to-do" than a pleasure for me. So I was determined to find organic versions of every staple I enjoy so I wouldn't trigger any of my old issues.

Because my endocrine system is already teetering on the fine line between wellness and non-wellness, I needed to find dairy products and meats that were produced without pesticides, synthetic fertilizers, synthetic growth or breeding hormones, antibiotics, and genetically engineered crops in livestock feed. That's a tall order. But there are brands like Organic Valley that do meet those requirements.

Lunardi's had some Organic Valley products and organic meats, but not much. I was pretty discouraged as we exited that store. However, our shopping trip was a success thanks to Whole Foods. I was able to find an organic version of everything including sandwich meats like turkey and ham as well as American cheese! We came home with butter, whole wheat bread, meats, cheeses, cherries, strawberries, apples, spinach, lettuce, and more. I've spent the last 3 days eating this wholesome fare and it's been a treat instead of a chore.

Yes, buying organic means we'll be spending more money. But I can't afford to go back to where I was 6 months ago. And Hubby and I figure since we won't be eating out anymore at any place that doesn't serve completely safe foods for me to consume, the money we save from that will go toward all the organic foods we buy. And we'll probably end up saving money in the long run.

Well, my temperature's rising... and that's a good thing!

2011-06-17T17:44:00.000-07:00

Because of the thyroid meds Dr. Cook has me on, I've been tracking my body temp for almost 3 weeks now, and I've been pleased to find that it has consistently been above 97F (36C) and often above 98F (37C). My average temp has been 97.9F. That's much better than the 96F temp reading I had when I was in the doctor's office the last time.

Dr. Cook explained to me that there are enzymes the body uses for metabolizing things that need a certain level of warmth in order for them to be most effective. So even a degree or two low and those enzymes don't work efficiently.

I've also been pleased to find that I haven't gotten sick with a virus since I've been taking the 6000 iu of Vitamin D daily for the past 3 months. I was always getting sick with something, so this is a major milestone for me too.

I can feel my body finding balance again. It's very subtle, but I can feel it.

I have a Skype appointment with Dr. Cook coming up to go over my latest blood test panel results (I had seven). I'm hoping the results show that my body is moving in the right direction. And if not, I'm hoping that it will help Dr. Cook zero in on any other issues that need to be tackled.

I've been very good about not pushing my body beyond its limits, so my pain levels have been mostly low to non-existent. It's funny that of all the things I face, keeping myself from overdoing it is the biggest challenge. I think it's an issue many women would face.

Taking two steps forward and one step back... but at least it's progress

2011-06-01T19:07:00.000-07:00

Progress of this sort always frustrates me... particularly when it comes to my physical well-being. But I have to keep telling myself that at least it's progress of some sort instead of where I was prior to surgery.

Last week was a full week with me traveling multiple times to do the flowers for a niece's wedding that was being held 3 1/2 hours away from where I live. Early in the week, I traveled by Amtrak down and back in a span of less than 24 hours to accept delivery of the fresh flowers and get them in water. And then two days later I traveled by car down the same distance to do the arranging and then came home after the wedding. I ended up spending long stints of time sitting while constructing the various arrangements (35 in all).

My body isn't happy with me at all right now. I've had to take my heavy-duty pain meds for the first time in weeks. I took some time yesterday to watch some more of my surgery DVD (I'd only watched the first 40 minutes before). And it confirmed what my body has been telling me... Dr. Cook really had to do a lot of work in my pelvic cavity to remove all the damaged tissue. Like he said, "We really picked on you down there." He wasn't kidding. It's been 4 months since surgery, but when there's that much surgical work involved there's also a lot of healing involved. I just can't seem to get that through my thick head.

Fortunately, the wedding flowers were the last pre-surgery obligation I made. Now I have a a free calender that I will not let myself fill so my body can take the time it needs to heal. Anyone have any suggestions on things to watch on Netflix?

Listening to the "internal iPod" in my head

2011-05-16T16:03:00.000-07:00

I've had the lyrics of a song running through my head today. Very often when this happens, I need to pay attention to the words that replay over and over in the "internal iPod" in my head, because I'm supposed to glean something from them--hope, insight, inspiration.

The song is by Shania Twain. I don't even know if she's officially recorded it. I've only seen it on her new television show, "Why Not". Fortunately, she has chosen to share the segment from her show on youTube so I could listen to it again and transcribe the words. I definitely needed this today. Thank you, Shania.

Today
by Shania Twain

You got what it takes you can win,
Today is your day to begin.
Don't give up here, don't you quit.
The moment is now, this is it

Today is your day
And nothing can stand in your way
Today is your day
And everything's goin' your way
Today
Today
Today
Today

Just take one step at a time
Oh I promise that you will be fine

Today
Today
Today
Today
I say today
Today

Chocolate can cure just about everything... except sheer stupidity

2011-05-04T13:26:00.000-07:00

My latest e-card design at pingg. Click here to send it for FREE!

Yesterday marked 14 weeks since my surgery. And if it wasn't for my own stupidity, I'd probably be doing really well right about now. But leave it to me, "The Sledgehammer Queen", to try to take on a task that's far too big for someone in my post-op state to manage.

I'll give you the truncated version:

ordered a pallet of huge slabs of flagstone (important to note they were stacked vertically)
leveled an area in the front garden and installed a flagstone patio for a small fountain
felt fine afterward so thought I'd do more in the back garden (big mistake)
rolled "just one more" slab off the pallet which shifted the weight
pallet of flagstone tipped over and landed a few feet over our property line onto the neighbor's driveway
in a state of impaired judgment I decide to move all slabs back onto our side of the property line by sledgehammering into liftable chunks and carting them by wheelbarrow to the back garden... by myself
Need I say more?

Needless to say, the tissue in my lower abdomen and pelvic cavity are not happy with me. I've been swollen for over a week now. Now instead of being able to go out into the garden where I find a great deal of satisfaction, serenity and enjoyment doing small tasks like weeding and pruning, I can't do anything. It's my own dumb fault.

You'd think I'd learn. But the family motto "How hard can it be?" must have a genetic component that runs deep in my veins because I never seem to learn.

Okay, can I just whine for a wee little bit?

2011-04-21T14:36:00.000-07:00

I hate getting used to new meds. Right now I feel like the flower above... kind of there but a little worse for wear yet still looking toward the light on the horizon. Dr. Cook told me that it would take a week or two for my body to acclimate to the Metformin I'd be on. Hubby already went through the experience firsthand years ago and concurred. It all sounded so nice in theory.

Being only 12 weeks out from surgery probably doesn't help. There's a lot of grumbling and unhappiness in my digestive tract that's different from the intestinal distress I was told to expect. My insides are probably saying, "Haven't we been through enough? Now what are you doing to us?"

All I can say is, "Sorry" and then feel like a lump while my insides try to work it all out--all the while repeating little mantras I say to myself...

"There's a light on the horizon... keep your eye on it."

"This is all very temporary."

"I've been through worse... remember what it was like before surgery?"

"It could be worse... it could be raining."

Oh... it has been raining? Well, never mind that one.

On to post-op phase 2: Tackling my other health issues

2011-04-08T12:15:00.000-07:00

I celebrated my 10 week post-op milestone with a Skype appointment with Dr. Cook to discuss my progress and the results of my recent blood tests. It was so cool to sit in the comfort of my own home and meet with my doctor. Technology is the best! And a technologically savvy doctor is even better!!!

A few weeks ago Dr. Cook had me go in for a 3 hour glucose tolerance test. At the same time he had them take blood for a 3 hour insulin test to compare the numbers. I also had my A1C tested that identifies the average plasma glucose concentration in my body over a prolonged period of time.

Dr. Cook didn't like the numbers that came back. I'm used to a lot of the jargon and baseline numbers because Hubby has Type 2 diabetes, so I didn't like the numbers that came back either. My A1C is too high at 6.3 and my insulin and glucose numbers over the 3 hour period indicate pretty strongly that I am insulin resistant. Basically, this means that the insulin in my body is less effect at lowering blood sugars than it should be. I'm not diabetic but my numbers indicate pre-diabetic levels. And since my diet and nutrition is already very close to the one followed by diabetics, Dr. Cook highly recommended that I begin taking Metformin. Dr. Cook also wants me to take two nutraceuticals--MetaGlycemX™ and Insinase™.

Once we discussed the insulin and glucose issues, we moved on to discuss the results from my thyroid panel and the reverse T3 test. Those numbers weren't pretty either and indicate that I have an under-performing thyroid. My low body temp of 96.7F (35.94C) was the doctor's first indication that this was the case, and the tests confirmed it. So once my body acclimates to the metformin then I will begin taking a thyroid med.

I know that a lot of people may have been overwhelmed and stressed by the results and the discussion of the solutions, but for me it was a relief. I have suspected for years that my thyroid wasn't right and also suspected insulin resistance. I've asked previous doctors to please refer me to an endocrinologist to explore why my body is so "off", but it always fell on deaf ears. To finally have Dr. Cook (an endocrinologist as well as an endometriosis surgeon) order the right tests and then interpret them correctly is a huge relief. I finally have a battle plan and am armed so I can tackle what I've wanted to tackle for years.

In a perfect world, I'd rather have a perfectly functioning body. But that has never been my reality. I'm simply happy with identifying the issues and then actively addressing them so I can have health and wellness finally... even if I've had to wait until I'm 44 years old to finally get it. The spring of 2011 is turning into a symbolic springtime for my life in many ways and it's blossoming with possibilities.

Post-op update 7 wks: Seeing myself from the inside

2011-03-16T15:12:00.000-07:00

Yesterday marked the 7 week mark since my surgery. Interestingly, the dvd of my surgery came in the mail the day before, so Hubby and I found ourselves watching a portion of the dvd yesterday evening. This may seem odd to some, but we both found it fascinating.

Because the surgery was laparoscopic, Dr. Cook had to use cameras to see what he was doing inside me anyway. So it stands to reason that what the camera was "seeing" would also be recorded digitally. None of the surgical prep is included on the dvd (thankfully). It only shows what the laparoscope "saw" as it showed Dr. Cook what he needed to see. "Ports" (looking like short sections of plumbing) were put into each of the three small incisions that were made--one through my navel and one over each hip. The camera and surgical equipment were put into each one and switched around throughout the surgery depending on the area being addressed. It was interesting to watch the footage when the camera was being switched from one "port" to another--one of the few times anything outside my body was visible.

It is a rare opportunity to get to see inside one's own body. I was amazed at what I look like. Of course, as an artist, I noticed all the different colors of the tissues and organs. Who knew I was so many different shades of pink in there?

It is also a rare opportunity to get to witness a surgery being performed on one's own body. I consider it a wonderful privilege afforded me by modern technology to get to see the artistry of my surgeon as he used a CO2 laser to perform vaporization of the nasty endometriosis and adhesions that riddled my internal organs. Watching the dvd has further deepened my gratitude for Dr. Cook as well as the medical advances that made such a procedure possible. Most adhesions looked like thick cobwebs stringing one organ to another. And one by one I got to watch that laser focus on each one and literally vaporize them into curls of vapors swirling around in front of the camera. I'm telling you, it is fascinating stuff!

An interesting additional benefit of seeing the video is that I have been given a better understanding of how to allow my body to heal going forward. I was feeling tempted to push myself to resume all normal activity once the 6 week mark rolled by. I realize now that I need to take things slower. I've allowed myself to take a longer leave of absence from my creative career activities instead of trying to push through the muscles spasms up and down my trunk that happen every time I try to sit and create in my studio.

Normalcy will come.

I know that.

But for now, since I've literally seen myself from the inside, I know I need to let my insides take the time they need to heal.

Curious about the surgical techniques for the removal of endometriosis?
Dr. Andrew Cook, a world-renowned surgeon specializing
in the treatment of endometriosis,
discusses the various methods for removal and
shares his philosophy on these options in
a great article on OBGYN.net
To Excise or Not to Excise

Post-op update 6 wks: Cleared for take off!

2011-03-07T11:55:00.000-08:00

Last Friday, I had my final post-op appointment with Dr. Cook that finalized the "surgical phase" of my treatment. I have been feeling so good for almost a week now that I was honestly able to tell him my pain levels were zero at the appointment (and I didn't have any pain meds in my system). Dr. Cook cleared me to resume all activity that I feel good enough to engage in as long as I take it in stages and don't overdo it. He also cleared me to do hot tub therapy and massage therapy. I feel like I've passed a major milestone!

The next step is to address the secondary issues Dr. Cook is concerned about--namely my low body temperature (I was 96.7F at the appointment--two degrees below normal). In the next week or two, I have to do a glucose/insulin 3 hour test and some other specialty blood work to determine if I have a thyroid issue or not.

Dr. Cook is also addressing my Vitamin D deficiency (normal is a level of 50-100 and I'm at 10). I'm now taking 6,000 i.u. of Vitamin D a day as directed by him. After taking the Vitamin D for two months, I have to do more blood work to see if my levels have gone up.

I'm focusing a lot of my efforts on adding more nutrients into my diet from whole foods like fruits and vegetables. Since I'm a "supertaster" and taste things with far more intensity than most people, eating some vegetables has always been a challenge for me because I taste unpalatable nuances in foods that others don't (e.g., fresh tomatoes taste like I'm eating the tomato plant instead of the fruit). So Hubby (who does all the cooking) is going to begin employing techniques used by Jessica Seinfeld in her cookbook Deceptively Delicious so I can get the good nutrition from the veggies without being able to taste those nuances.

In the past few years I've removed almost all trans fats (hydrogenated oils) from my diet and increased my intake of whole grains. I'm now trying to eliminate almost all processed flour as well as make sure the majority of my food is as close to fresh and unprocessed as possible.

Little by little as we tackle all the "mystery stuff", I know my health will increase even more. The surgery gave me the freedom. Dr. Cook gave me the clearance for "take off". Now I just need to make sure I'm fueled properly and ready to go.

Post-op update 3.5 wks: A week of mini milestones and stopping to smell the flowers

2011-02-18T14:13:00.000-08:00

Another week has passed filled with more healing and more progress toward wellness. It feels so good to be on an upward trend instead of being on a downward one as I was before surgery.

I've forced myself to not work. I'm determined to keep myself from doing so until the 6 week mark has passed. Working would mean spending a great deal of time sitting in my office chair creating. I know myself well enough to know that once I'm in "creative mode", I lose track of time and everything else--including the common sense that would tell me when to stop because my body is hurting and doesn't like it. It's just best if I don't do any creating until after 6 weeks have passed.

Because that huge part of my life has been put on the shelf for the time being, I've found myself engaging in a lot of introspective activities.

This week, Hubby and I took a walk up and down half of our street and discovered the ornamental plum trees on the corner are in bloom. We also discovered that ornamental plum blossoms have a faint floral aroma. I never knew that before.

I felt up to strolling the garden this week. I found the little jonquils at the base of the olive tree are still in bloom. When the sun shines on them (and if I stand in just the right spot) their heady fragrance wafts up to my nose.

Later in the week, I learned how to delegate a major gardening activity to Hubby when our huge potted New Zealand flax blew over in some strong winds and needed to be up-righted and transplanted to a larger heavier pot. It was hard to stand aside and give verbal directions on what needed to be done, but I managed to do it. And dear Hubby was so patient as I tried to articulate what needed to happen (lots of hand signals were involved). I did pull a few weeds from some raised planters while we were out there... until Hubby caught me and told me to stop.

This week also marked the addition of some more regular foods back into my diet. Because of all the surgical work that was done around my digestive tract, I've had to be very selective about my food intake and follow a modified B.R.A.T. diet (bananas, rice, applesauce and toast). I was feeling like I could try and add some things back in and was pleased that my body cooperated pretty well. Last night, Hubby made me a wonderful hamburger with fresh ground beef on a whole wheat bun with some ketchup and some caramelized pan-sauteed onion. It was the first beef I've had since surgery. It tasted so good and didn't cause problems--another great milestone reached!

I am reminded of the movie "What About Bob?" and the line "Baby steps to four o'clock..." Every day I take baby steps toward wellness. They are small and often hardly noticeable, but they are baby steps forward and that's the direction I want to be headed.

"Could be worse... could be raining" is now available in a Kindle Edition
Click here to subscribe so you can read at your leisure and on-the-go

Post-op update 2.5 wks: The nitty gritty of what my surgeon found

2011-02-11T12:54:00.000-08:00

Even though my second week in recovery has had its ups and downs with a minor setback due to a reaction to antibiotics I had to take, I'm doing very well. And since I received my copy of the surgery report, I have gained perspective in how well I'm really doing considering what Dr. Cook found and what procedures were performed in my abdomen.

Here's what Dr. Cook noted in his "findings" in my surgical report:

Stage IV endometriosis
extensive omental and bowel adhesions
adhesions extending from the umbilicus down into the pelvis
a band of adhesions also in this area
the bowel densely adherent over the bladder and both pelvic sidewalls
a complete obliteration of the pelvic cavity
upper abdominal organs were normal
appendix was normal

I won't publish the entire procedure here in detail, but here are the highlights:

Interior of the bladder was examined via a scope inserted through the ureter and found to be normal
Three incisions were made for the laproscope--one in the belly button, one of the left side of the lower abdomen and one of the right side
Bowel adhesions were dissected off the bladder
Descending colon was dissected off the left abdominal side wall
Sigmoid colon was dissected off the left pelvic brim
"Slowly, but surely" (an exact quote from the report) the planes were developed in spite of complete obliteration of the pelvis ["obliteration" means "to make undecipherable or imperceptible by obscuring"]
Bowel was dissected off the cervix and both pelvic sidewalls
All peritoneum and fibrosis was resected
Ureters were dissected out of the entire pelvic sidewalls
All fibrosis was resected out of both perirectal spaces as well as the rectovaginal septum
Superficial endometriosis and fibrosis was resected off the rectal serosa
Bladder was dissected off the cervix
Cervix was removed
Suturing and close-up happened

I know the above illustration is small but it's the largest I could find on the web that showed everything.

The Pathology Report

The pathology report was attached to my surgical report. A total of 6 specimens were taken and submitted to pathology from the different areas that were operated on during the procedure. Of the six specimens, three came back showing that I had active endometriosis on my right and left pelvic sidewalls as well as on the rectovaginal tissue.

My Insights and Thoughts

Holy cow! No wonder I felt like I did!
A hysterectomy doesn't cure endometriosis! My case proves that even after a hysterectomy, endometriosis can still thrive and grow without reproductive organs being present. If you're told otherwise, seek a second opinion!!!!
Just like a cancer survivor, I don't think I can ever have complete peace of mind that the disease is completely gone. But I can start marking my time from this point forward and enjoying the freedom I've been afforded thanks to Dr. Andrew Cook's surgical expertise.
I definitely need to take the entire 6 weeks of suggested recovery time and let my body rest so it can heal. Although I am always tempted to jump the gun in this department, this time I'm going to exercise every ounce of self-restraint and take it slow.
And, finally, I am very hopeful that now that my omentum, descending colon, sigmoid colon and bladder are freed from being stuck to things they shouldn't have been stuck to my body will find a proper balance and I can begin to lose weight and find true wellness for the first time in a very long time.

I owe so much to my extremely talented and compassionate surgeon, Dr. Andrew Cook. He has a great blog where he chronicles his road to becoming who he is today. If you have the time, I highly recommend reading his story. It's great reading! Links are below:

Freezing Nails
Amazing Mentor
The Benevolent Dictator
Award Winning Scientist
A Computer at My Fingertips Reaches Around the World
Core Lessons
Vital Health Institute

Meet "my" amazing medical team at Vital Health Institute

Post-op update 1.5 wks: The joy of living in stretchy pants

2011-02-04T14:23:00.000-08:00

It's been a week and half since my surgery and my body is cooperating in the healing process. I still have to take pain medication regularly in order to maintain a level of comfort that is conducive to healing (just as Dr. Cook instructed). My energy levels are better than I anticipated, and I'm also surprised how easily I was able to go back to a regular food diet.

Although I'm tempted to push myself and just "go go go", I'm forcing myself to follow doctor's orders and give my body the full 6 weeks of post-op recovery that he said I will need. Who knows what I'll be like around week 4.

I have yet to receive my own copy of the written surgery report and the dvd of my surgery, but that will come eventually. I want to know all the details involved in the procedure but I'm doing well being patient as I wait. Once I have the report in my hot little hands, I'll be pouring over it in great detail.

For now, I'm enjoying a recuperative "vacation" spent in oh-so-comfy lounging togs (aka stretchy pants, sweats or PJs) while watching copious amounts of HGTV and all my fave shows on the dvr and Netflix.

And when I need a little "action"... I go up and down the stairs a couple of times in one day.

It's real! The endo is really "out-o" and my journey toward wellness begins

2011-01-30T14:18:00.000-08:00

When I've shared the above photo, I've been asked "Is this real?" My answer is, "Yes! I was at the marina with camera in hand and happened to look up at just the right time when a seagull flew in front of the sun. Luckily, I snapped the shutter in time."

Since my surgery last Tuesday, both my husband and I have been asking ourselves the same question... "Is this real?" There is so much that occurred on Tuesday that seems unbelievable. We're still trying to wrap our heads around it.

In my last pre-op appt on Monday, Dr. Cook had me sign off on all the consents necessary prior to surgery. The list of possible surgical actions was pretty extensive and included things like the possibility that my appendix might have to be removed; the possibility of hernia repair; and the potential of bowel resection in case a section of my bowel needed to be removed because of endo damage. That long list of "possibles" made estimating the length of the surgery difficult. A total of 300 minutes (5 hours) had been blocked out for the operating room and staff, but Dr. Cook said it could go longer... much longer. I was mentally prepared for that.

On Tuesday a little after noon, I went in to surgical admitting at Good Samaritan in San Jose. All my vitals were taken. I was very calm. My very kind admitting nurse said I won the best blood pressure award for the day (124 over 79). I got changed into a lovely lavender-periwinkle surgical gown, got my I.V. put in and finished my pre-op interviews with the admitting nurse. I signed and initialed more consents with the long list of "possibles" on them.

One of my OR nurses came and introduced herself. I liked her right away.

Then I met my anesthesiologist. I liked him right away too. He informed me that in order for Dr. Cook to have the best access during surgery, my body would be positioned at a steep incline with my head down. He then told me that I would probably wake up puffy and possibly have blurry vision from the pressure that could build up in my head.

Shortly after that, I was wheeled to the OR. I gave hugs and kisses to my husband, my mom and my sister-in-law before I was wheeled through a set of restricted-access double-doors and into the OR. I met my other OR nurse there and liked her right away too. I felt so calm and at ease. Everyone on my OR team was so kind, confident and capable. I closed my eyes and fell asleep assured that I was in excellent hands.

When I started to wake up from the anesthetic in post-op recovery I was surprised that the only discomfort I felt was the feeling of an overly full bladder. Even though I had a catheter in, my bladder tissue was in spasm causing me the sensation (it was rectified with a dose of peridium in my I.V. once I got settled in my room where I would spend the night). My vision was blurry as I had anticipated. I finally asked someone what time it was and how long the surgery had taken. Imagine my surprise when I told it was only 4 1/2 hours from the time I'd gone to sleep! It was the first time this week I asked myself, "Is this real?"

Dr. Cook's first words after greeting my family following surgery while I waking up were, "Mission accomplished!"

My wonderful sister-in-law took great notes when Dr. Cook met with them. Her notes read:

4 1/2 hour surgery
harder than expected
scar tissue and bowels stuck
was over the bladder
getting back to normal anatomy
got cervix removed
did well overall
appendix was fine--didn't have to remove it
face is puffy from being upside down
will take catheter out in morning
first 2 weeks will be sore
by 3 weeks will still be tired but better

Dr. Cook had taken fascinating photographs through the laparoscope and had them in-hand when he met with my family post-op. He told my family he wished he'd taken more. I think he was too busy concentrating on the tasks at hand.

He then repeated his initial statement, "Mission accomplished." He had gotten all the endometriosis and all the scarring/adhesions out. It was gone. My body was free. I was back to normal anatomy. My husband found himself thinking, "Is this real?"

Five days later both of us catch ourselves still thinking the same thing. My post-op discomfort and pain has been so minimal with the help of the pain meds that it seems too good to be true. I've been up and moving around since only a few hours following waking up from surgery.

Yes. It is real. The endo is gone. It is real. My journey on the road to wellness has begun.

I'm anxious to get the official surgical report so I can read it. I'm also looking forward to watching the video of the actual surgery to see what Dr. Cook saw. I will share some that here on the blog once I get it (not the video so don't worry).

In the meantime, I'm resting a lot. Sleeping is something my body wants to do all the time right now. And if I stay on schedule with taking my pain meds (generic Norco), sleeping is comfortable and restful. I'll post more in the days and weeks to come. Right now, it's time to rest again.

Facing the dawn with my sunny face on

2011-01-24T22:28:00.000-08:00

I had my last pre-op doctor's appointment today, and everything is a go! Although my surgeon was very realistic and frank with me about what my post-op recovery will most likely entail, I still feel peaceful and happily anticipatory at the prospect of finally having each future day be a day of healing instead of a day of waiting.

Endometriosis is such a tricky disease. I've learned that over the past few months in my self-imposed crash course of learning what I didn't know before. Dr. Cook and his staff have been instrumental in a lot of that learning. I am hopeful that once he's got his laparoscope inside that he (and eventually me) will have even more knowledge.

Many people may not think this is cool, but the fact that the entire surgery is being digitally recorded and that I get to have my own dvd of the surgery to keep afterward really intrigues me. Quite frankly, I'm curious to see what's been invading my body for about three decades. I doubt I'll invite friends over for popcorn when I view it though, so you can all rest assured you won't have to figure out a way to decline an invitation.

Killing time working the pre-op checklist

2011-01-13T20:28:00.000-08:00

When I initially met with my surgeon, I was given a neat and organized folder with all the helpful paperwork I would need before and after surgery. One paper, in particular, caught my attention... the checklist!

I love checklists.

And now with less than 2 weeks until surgery, I can finally turn to that checklist to occupy my impatient self! It's a great way to kill time. And it diverts my attention so I don't whine as much to my long-suffering husband.

There's lots of "fun" stuff on the checklist like: when to get my pre-op blood work done; when to stop taking certain medications and/or herbal supplements; and when to purchase and take priobiotic, magnesium citrate, and laxatives. I told you... "fun" stuff.

This week I got my blood drawn by a wonderful phlebotomist that did such a great job I didn't feel a thing even though it took two tries to find a vein, and there were over a dozen vials that needed to be filled. I was amused to see another phlembotomist's framed certificate on the shelf of the blood draw room we were in. The woman's last name was "Hurts". There was a wedding photo on another wall, so I began to wonder if "Hurts" is her married name or her maiden name? Did she choose her profession with that last name or did the last name get given to her after the fact? As you can tell, I had a lot of time to think up lots of inane questions.

This week also marked the date on the checklist that I can no longer take certain medications until after the surgery. There were lots of herbal supplements on the list too but since I don't take any I didn't really have to worry about them. But I do have to go without taking any pain relievers like ibuprofen and aspirin until after surgery because they're considered blood thinners. Since ibuprofen is the only pain med that works for me, I'm having to tough it out.

I'm finding prayer to be a great pain reliever... that and copious amounts of orange sherbet ice cream.

Going forward with faith into the new year and my surgery

2011-01-07T00:14:00.000-08:00

With faith, I stepped into the new year hopeful that the change-over of our health insurance had gone as planned over the Christmas holiday so my medical team could pick up the ball and run with it on January 3rd when they got back to the office.

My faith was not in vain.

I have an amazing team of people working to make my surgery happen--my husband, the staff at my doctor's office and (believe it or not) some kind souls at our new health insurance provider's office.

To my relief, I've been informed that the surgery date being targeted is only 2 1/2 weeks away. I've got a pre-op checklist to work on between now and then. I'm sure the time will go by quickly.

I'm trying my best to stay comfortable. Fortunately, sitting in my studio working on art doesn't cause me much discomfort. And my sweet husband is taking care of all other household tasks. I'm one fortunate woman!

When are we gonna get there? When are we gonna get there?

2010-12-15T19:34:00.000-08:00

When dealing with an individual with a lack of patience such a child or pooch, it is wise to give said individuals mini milestones as diversions to keep the "when are we gonna get there" behavior at bay. On a 6 hour road trip with children, it may be the game of spotting out-of-state license plates. In the waiting room at the vet with a pup, it might be a rawhide chew.

It's taken me many years to admit it openly and without shame, but I am willing to admit it in writing right now... I suffer from a chronic state of diminished patience. Yes. I am patience-deficient. And like the aforementioned tots and canines, the most effective coping mechanism for me is having a mini milestone (or two... or three... or four...) to keep me from turning into a whining "when are we gonna get there" brat. It preserves my husband's sanity and prevents me from making a complete nuisance of myself.

At my last appointment, my doctor unknowingly threw out a perfect milestone for me to latch onto. While looking in my mouth he noted that I had two mercury amalgam fillings and said in an off-handed fashion something like, "Have you considered having those replaced?"

I was happy to reply that my dentist has been systematically switching them out over the last couple of years because of his concern about the health risks associated with mercury. I then added that those two fillings were the last ones left.

With a smile my doctor said, "Well, it looks like I'm preaching to the choir then. I strongly suggest you get those last two replaced, because we're still not sure what influence they have on endometriosis."

That's all he needed to say. I had a golden mini milestone to latch onto like a dog on a rawhide chew.

Appointments were made with our dentist, so I could have the fillings replaced. My husband decided to do the same. My focus over the month of November and the early part of December was simply to get those offending fillings out of my mouth. But just as quickly as the Novocaine from the procedure wore off, the placating effect of this milestone was gone once I had checked it off my to-do list.

Now I'm back to being like an obnoxious child in the backseat of the family sedan griping about how long it's taking to get to Disneyland. It doesn't help that my body feels like it's grinding to a halt progressively each week I have to wait. My ability to do normal everyday tasks like vacuuming has been diminished to a point I never thought I'd be at in my life again.

But I'm whining...

The logical solution is to give me another to-do milestone, right? I figured if we could get the surgery date set, that would help. In order to do that, the doctor's office needs to work up what the costs will be, which hospital should be used to be compatible with our insurance coverage, and how much we're going to be paying out-of-pocket. Even though we haven't received any of our paperwork in the mail, our new insurance provider was kind enough to give us our member numbers over the phone but informed us that our member numbers aren't connected to a specific health-care plan in their system yet. The paperwork still has to come from my husband's employer and that usually doesn't happen until the week between Christmas and New Year's. Consequently, the billing codes and dollar amounts my doctor's office needs aren't available until we are in the system fully.

Oh, and did I mention that my doctor's office is closed from December 23rd to January 3rd?

Yeah... Lovely...

"But it's still do-able," I think to myself, "We can still get my surgery scheduled in the first week to week and half of the new year. I can will my body to be okay until then. As long as I don't have to wait until the end of January or the first of February, I can do this."

Famous last words...

Then we found out my doctor's assistant surgeon (who must be present for my surgery to occur) is going to be unavailable the first weeks of January through the 23rd. The earliest date I could have surgery is January 24th.

When we were informed of this little tidbit, my first thought was,"Well, he'll probably be vacationing in some tropical locale like Tahiti during those weeks". (Yes, my impatience can make me somewhat snarky.) Maybe my own secret desire to be lounging in a chaise surf-side somewhere during those weeks has a lot to do with that conclusion on my part.

Believe me. If we didn't have large medical bills staring us in the face, I'd figure out a way to be on a tropical island myself until January 23rd! If I have to feel lousy and can't clean my house, I might as well be looking at the rolling Hawaiian surf instead of the dust bunnies that are breeding faster than I can count.

Seems like sound logic to me! Too bad my bank account (and my husband) wouldn't agree.

For more information on ways to reduce the risk factors of endometriosis, you may want to read Endometriosis: The complete guide for taking charge of your health by Mary Lou Ballweg and the Endometriosis Association

Walking one little baby step at a time

2010-11-01T14:27:00.000-07:00

During the past week following my consultation and appointment with Dr. Cook, I've been acutely aware of the miracles in my life--both small and not-so-small. There are some things in life that happen in such beautifully aligned orchestration that I can only attribute them to a higher power whose eyes can see things from a perspective that I cannot.

I've always loved maps, so a few years ago I came up with an analogy that I picture at times like this...

I imagine a paper road map of the state of California all unfolded and spread out. I'm like an ant crawling along on the map, only able to see a giant ink line in front of me. Sometimes I can't even tell what that ink line's name is, but I just continue to follow it. Then there is God--the holder of the map. From His perspective He can see the map in its entirety and can see the things my ant eyes cannot see from my limited vantage point. He can see that the black ink line I'm following is actually a road--Interstate 5 to be exact. And if I continue traveling in the direction I'm headed, I will eventually reach a wonderful destination--Disneyland! My loving Heavenly Father can see each leg of my journey plainly. He knows there are some odd little towns I must pass through. He knows there are rest areas along the way. He knows there are off-ramps I could take if I'm not paying attention to His navigational guidance, and I can get lost. But if I'm ever lost and wandering, He's always there to navigate me back to the road I need to be on whenever I'm ready to finally listen again.

I have felt like that little ant this past week... in a good way.

Because our current health insurance through Hubby's employer (a health care provider itself) didn't cover any of the specialized services I will need, we were facing some hefty expenses. The black ink line in front of us seemed extremely daunting.

But as divinely orchestrated timing is often perfect, my physical complications increased significantly over a short period of time so that I would seek out medical information and advice over the months of August and September. I would have continued to just put up with things otherwise, because I hate going to the doctor for anything.

All that researching led me to find Dr. Cook's website and get an appointment only a week before the month of October ended, coinciding perfectly with the October 31st deadline of the open enrollment period of Hubby's employer the only time once a year when we could change our health insurance options.

And, miraculously, his employer now offers one health insurance option outside their facilities/network that wasn't offered only a few years ago. That PPO option will pay 90% of in-network costs and 70% of out-of-network costs. This means that Dr. Cook and his assistant surgeon are the only two items that will be out-of-network for my surgery. The rest can be arranged in-network.

As an added blessing, our new health insurance option has a maximum out-of-pocket cap on it that is a fraction of the original medical fees we were going to have to pay over the next year with pre-op, surgical and post-op costs. There will still be out-of-pocket expenses incurred, but I am hopeful that some creative projects I have planned will contribute significantly to paying those so our household budget doesn't take a hit.

I am humbled by it all... truly humbled. And I am filled with immense gratitude.

I will have to wait until the first of next year when our new health insurance coverage takes effect to move forward with surgery, but I can tough things out for a couple of months. It is a small price to pay.

In the meantime, I'm just going to continue to walk along that big black ink line one little baby-ant-step at a time.

We drove over 120 miles today to get some peace of mind and got hope as a "parting gift"

2010-10-25T17:43:00.000-07:00

Despite much trepidation, I went to see a specialist today. I'm so glad I did. My husband and I had to drive over 60 miles one way to get to the Vital Health Institute to meet with Dr. Andrew Cook, but it was a drive worth making. It was one of the most positive experiences I've had dealing with the medical profession. That's saying a lot.

The incredibly kind staff and soothing office ambiance put my mind at ease shortly after arriving. Prior to any exam, my husband and I had an opportunity to meet with the doctor in a comfortable consultation room furnished with cushy chairs. It was so refreshing to be able to review my medical file in comfort and fully clothed instead of sitting on an exam table with my chilled legs dangling from underneath a paper smock.

Here are some more refreshing aspects of my visit:

The doctor wasn't rushed because he sets aside an hour to an hour and a half for initial patient consultations/exams.
He had reviewed my file before I came in so he was familiar with my history and ready to "hit the ground running".
The doctor managed to be both kind and straightforward in his answers.
He performed the ultrasound/sonogram himself so he got images of what he is looking for instead of what a tech thinks he may want to see.

I had my share of "a-ha" moments during the consultation as Dr. Cook enlightened and educated us. Here are the major "a-ha's" I gleaned from my consultation and exam:

The doctor suggested that because of the nature of ovarian tissue (it's very sinewy) and because of the amount of scar tissue I had around my ovaries back in 2005, it is highly probable that a piece of an ovary was left behind back in 2005. It would explain why my symptoms have somewhat a cyclic pattern.
The doctor helped us understand that endometriosis implants are, for all intents and purposes, "tumors". And recent research has uncovered that those implants can create their own estrogen and keep going even if all reproductive organs have been removed or shut down artificially. That's why recurrence after hysterectomy is high if all implants are not excised the first time. It's also why popular hormone therapies (e.g., Lupron) can be ineffective.
The doctor showed us that even though endometriosis can't be "seen" with ultrasound, a trained specialist's eye can see indications that scar tissue is most probably present (as in my case).
Based on my exam, the doctor believes I may have interstitial cystitis in addition to the endometriosis. The two conditions could be related.
Finally, the doctor enlightened us that long-term sufferers of endometriosis can end up experiencing other tangentially related issues. In my case, I may have a connected form of insulin resistance. All of that will be explored further down the road.

Even though my case is a complex one, he is hopeful that with surgery I can regain the quality of life I had a brief glimpse of a couple of years ago. It means that surgery is in my future. But it also means that there's hope of feeling well again!

Dr. Cook used a great analogy. He said it's like someone that's getting horrible gas mileage with their car. They can go have it tuned up, get new tires, and overhaul everything. Then come to find out that the emergency brake has been engaged the whole time. The emergency brake has to be disengaged or all the other measures won't make up for it. The car will still get lousy gas mileage. Endometriosis implants are like the emergency brake. We have to take care of that first or nothing else that we do will really solve the problem.

This all means that we have to make some harder decisions if we want to make surgery a possibility due to financial considerations, because Dr. Cook is an "out-of-network" doctor for any health care coverage, not just ours. Other aspects of the surgery like the hospital and anesthesiologist could be covered by some PPO health insurance plans, which we don't have. We have some options in that arena, so we're having to examine those carefully.

Despite those factors, both of us came out of the appointment feeling like a huge weight had been lifted off our shoulders--this, after we had both been on the verge of tears going into the experience. That's very telling to me. The calmness we each feel individually and together is very telling too.

Needless to say the 60 mile drive home was a lot less tense then the ride there.

More pieces of the puzzle with the receipt of my surgical records

2010-10-12T15:11:00.000-07:00

WARNING: THIS POST CONTAINS LOTS OF MEDICAL TERMS AND SURGICAL SPECIFICS AND MAY NOT BE APPROPRIATE FOR AUDIENCES THAT HAVE RECENTLY CONSUMED A MEAL.

Over the weekend, I received my medical records from my surgery back in 2005. This is the first time I've had them in my possession and been able read them for myself. My emotions are trying to find an even keel right now. It's hard. I know my brain is just trying to process everything.

The striking part of the surgical report is at the top of the first page. It reads:

PREOPERATIVE DIAGNOSES:
Bilateral ovarian cysts.
Left hydrosalpinx.*
Pelvic pain.

* A hydrosalpinx is a distally blocked fallopian tube filled with serous or clear fluid that can become distended giving the tube a sausage-like shape (as in my case)

Then right below it is the striking contrast. It reads:

POSTOPERATIVE DIAGNOSES:
Endometriosis
Right endometrioma**
left hydrosalpinx
left endometrioma**
Pelvic adhesions

**Endometrioma is a noncancerous cyst or tumor formed when a tiny patch of endometrial tissue (the mucous membrane that makes up the inner layer of the uterine wall) bleeds, sloughs off, becomes transplanted, and grows and enlarges inside the ovaries.

Clearly, my doctor had no clue that she would find what she did. It's as plain as day.

After our health care switch to Kaiser, I met with a new doctor and tried my best to get her up-to-speed with my surgical history. When I explained that my endometriosis was something the doctor had not suspected or anticipated, I had this new doctor patronizingly tell me that she was certain the doctor that performed my surgery must have had a suspicion of what would be found and that she was certain the surgeon wasn't caught off guard. I had begun to think she might be right--that my recollection of the events must have been filtered somewhat through my own surprise. But the surgical report proves otherwise--some vindication and validation for me.

It is also striking that the radiologist's write-up on my pre-op ultrasound findings don't give any hints either. More validation that no one suspected what was really going on inside me.

In addition to validation, I've had some new revelations come about while reading through my file.

The surgical report indicates that my endometrial adhesions were worse than I had been told. It states, "Packing of the bowel was difficult with adhesions of the sigmoid to the posterior aspect of the uterus, as well as ascending colon adhesed to the left hydrosalpinx and ovarian cyst."

The ascending colon (shown above as 1) is the first part of four sections of the large intestine. The sigmoid colon (pelvic colon) (shown above as 4) is the last part of the large intestine and is closest to the rectum.

Until now, I didn't know that both ends of my large intestine had been adversely affected. I had mistakenly thought it was only the last section of my colon that was affected. I can completely understand now why I was having such digestive problems prior to surgery. And I'm also understanding how endo implants left behind on both ends of my large intestine could be impacting my digestive health at present. It would explain a lot.

The surgical report goes on to state that the hysterectomy (pre-planned at my insistence) was started. After clamping and isolation took place the report then states:

"At this time, a decision was made to do a supracervical hysterectomy [leaving the cervix in] since our exposure in the pelvis was inadequate and the risk of injury to uterus was higher with the adhesion of the sigmoid to the lower aspect of the uterus. That was dissected down until we could perform a supracervical. At this time, the cautery was used to remove the uterus from the cervix and the specimen was removed from operative site. The right fallopian tube and ovary were then isolated with fine dissection."

When the doctor spoke to my husband and me immediately after surgery (once I was awake), she had indicated the reason for this decision was to avoid injury to my ureters that were heavily encased in adhesions (scar tissue). I'm thinking that she either left that out of the above statement or meant to type "ureters" instead of "uterus" in the first sentence. Regardless, it is clear that my surgeon was having to think on her feet and make decisions on the fly. Again evidence that she hadn't anticipated what she found.

When I moved on in my file to the post-op pathology report from the lab, I found other information that hadn't been passed on to me.

The post-pathology report states that there was a benign sessile endometrial polyp in my uterus "showing a striking degree of papillary and eosinophilic metaplasia".

Yeah... when I first read that I was thinking what you're thinking right now... WHAT?!?!

So I looked stuff up. Here's what I found:

A sessile polyp (less common than a pedunculated polyp) is an elongated flat mass in the inner lining of the uterus that can cause heavy menstrual bleeding (which I had).
A papillary metaplasia is a uterine lesion often usually found in women that have estrogen levels that aren't balanced by equal progesterone levels (which I had) as well as women with endometriosis (which I had).
Eosinophilic metaplasia "refers to the phenomenon in which endometrial cells are replaced by other types of cells which are either not seen or very rarely seen in normal endometrial glands". This phenomenon can also be estrogen induced. [Eosinophils or eosinophiles are white blood cells that are one of the immune system components responsible for combating multicellular parasites and certain infections in vertebrates. They are "acid-loving" and are normally found in the lower gastrointestinal tract, ovary, uterus, spleen, and lymph nodes. Increased levels are associated with auto-immune diseases.]

Interestingly, according to one source I found, one possible cause of endometriosis is metaplasia. This source also states that papillary metaplasia is rare and usually found in post-menopausal women (usually benign as it was in my case).

Here's why the pathology report is significant...

Prior to 2003, I had read a book about the symptoms associated with estrogen dominance. I had many, so I decided to order a saliva test through the internet to test my hormone levels and see if my hunch was correct. It showed that my estrogen levels were normal but that my progesterone levels were those of a post-menopausal woman (I was 33 and far from menopausal). Because my progesterone levels were so low in comparison to my estrogen levels, I was estrogen dominant. This fact was confirmed by a formal blood test when I was pregnant in March 2003 and I was subsequently classified as a "high risk pregnancy" because of such low progesterone levels. I lost the pregnancy at 13 weeks not knowing that the reason was because of the endometriosis and not my hormone levels.

Now that I sit here with my surgical report in my hands, I can see how everything is interconnected--more mysteries solved and more vindication after being told by one former doctor there wasn't anything wrong with my uterus and that I was imagining things (I only saw her once).

But the increased enlightenment and vindication still doesn't help the nervousness I feel about the path forward. I still have to juggle getting medical advice from doctors that are covered by our health insurance and getting a second opinion from a doctor who isn't.

I try not to think about it too much. Otherwise, I find myself tearing up or clinching my teeth from the stress. And teeth clinching just gives me a sore jaw and a headache. That's the last thing I need on top of everything else.

It feels much better to crank up some of my favorite tunes and have a sugar-free Popsicle or two.

True confessions of a turkey junky... a bonafide turkaconis freak

2010-10-06T20:45:00.001-07:00

A favorite holiday movie in our home is A Christmas Story. When Ralphie says descriptively, "Now it is well known in the midwest that the Old Man is a turkey junky--a bonafide golly turkaconis freak", Ralphie could easily be describing me! Autumn is my favorite season, and I have to slyly admit that's it's mostly because it is the official season of the turkey. That's how bad I am.

Growing up, turkey was served on two holidays--Thanksgiving and Christmas. The rest of the year we didn't have turkey much. Consequently, when it was served the turkey leftovers were used up completely over the week following the turkey dinner. My favorite use was when the turkey was sliced and put into grilled turkey sandwiches made just like a grilled cheese sandwich except with turkey instead of cheese. I have a purist's palate so the only thing on my sandwich was the turkey (white meat only please) and a dash of salt. That's it. I was in heaven.

Now thanks to the amazing deli turkey selection at the store, I can have turkey any time of year. Grilled turkey sandwiches taste best with carved turkey from a home-roasted bird, but I will happily settle for one stacked with fresh deli turkey.

Interestingly, it wasn't until only a few years ago that I discovered one of the reasons that I probably love the sandwiches so much. It turns out that turkey is a great food to boost neurotransmitters in a brain like mine that is short on serotonin. And if made with whole grain bread (I like Milton's whole wheat bread), there's an additional boost from the whole wheat! That's probably why, as a kid, I loved the sandwiches so much that I would crave them. My body and brain were loving all the fantastic turkey goodness!

Okay... now I want a grilled turkey sandwich... That or turkey and rice soup... Honey, we need to roast a turkey!

Things I wish I'd been told years ago about endo

2010-09-30T14:46:00.000-07:00

The past couple of weeks, I've been preparing to go back "into battle". One of the ways I do that is to arm myself with as much information as I possibly can. As I've scoured the internet for the latest information and research on my disease, I've found some amazing facts. I've started a link list in the sidebar of this blog so others can locate the same resources I have.

But one resource struck me so deeply I had to give it its own post.

From the website of the Endometriosis Association:

What we know about endometriosis today is in large part due to continuing research by the Endometriosis Association. Here are just a few of the breakthroughs our research has revealed
Endometriosis can be caused by exposure to dioxins: groundbreaking research started in 1992 shows that endometriosis can be directly related to environmental toxins such as dioxins, providing for the first time a provable cause of endometriosis Learn more
Endometriosis is an immune system disease: research shows endometriosis is an immune disease as well as an endocrine disease
Endometriosis linked to autoimmune diseases: research shows links to autoimmune diseases in women with endometriosis
Pain: research shows links to cancers in women with endometriosis Learn more
Age: research shows endometriosis is beginning at a younger age, is more severe, with more symptoms, and is more debilitating in girls and young women currently diagnosed
Diagnosis: research continues on noninvasive diagnostic techniques

Think "killer cramps" are normal? Think again!
Take this quick questionnaire
from the Endometriosis Research Center.

"Cute attacks" are good for me, go figure!

2010-09-28T14:48:00.000-07:00

This is Dexter and a normal sized cat bed called a "sherpa".
The bed isn't too small for other cats.... so you do the math.

I have found a lot of helpful and sound advice for living from Dr. Christiane Northrup, OB/GYN (you may have seen her on PBS). Ever since I heard her talk about a way to create positive chemical and hormonal reactions inside one's body to encourage health, I've tried to keep that as a priority. She said that the easiest way for a woman to achieve this is to think of something that makes her inner nurturing core glow.

Sounds too "new age"? Keep reading because it's sound medical advice backed by science.

Making your inner nurturing core glow is basically when you get warm fuzzies and are all fluttery inside because something has touched that nurturing place unique to women's brains. Dr. Northrup gave examples of what it means to make your inner nurturing core glow. For some it is the thought of a newborn baby. For others it is the thought of baby birds or puppies. For some (like me) it is the thought of baby kittens. It's the "ahhhhh" response that gets all those good "juices" firing off inside our brains. And those good "juices" create health and wellness.

Nurturing and emotional bonding (as well as other important things) are processed in a specific part of our brains--the limbic. And the limbic is larger in women than in men (explains why we are such good nurturers).

So, according to Dr. Northrup, the antidote for all the stress responses that I am barraged with daily is to find things that give me the warm fuzzies (or "cute attacks" as Hubby and I call them).

Now, I have to ask... what prompts you to have a "cute attack"?

"...And knowing is half the battle" ~G.I. Joe

2010-09-24T16:14:00.000-07:00

Knowing is Half the Battle sound bite

Nerds sound bites

A few weeks ago I was going through my normal routine of reading some local news when a headline on our local newspaper's website caught my eye.

"Endometriosis pains millions of women yet remains misunderstood and misdiagnosed"

Having been diagnosed with endometriosis 5 years ago, of course I was curious what they had to say. As I read through the article there wasn't much that was new to me... except for one little word... "disease". Over and over the word "disease" was used to describe what I had. Slowly it began to sink in that what I had been diagnosed with 5 years ago wasn't a "condition" or a "syndrome". It was a disease. And as I began to explore more resources, I realized that despite my hysterectomy 5 years ago, this disease is not something in my past. It is very much a part of my present reality.

Earlier this year I got a flu that was going around that walloped the heck out of everyone's digestive tract who became ill with it. I was no exception. As the months went on and I began to feel other digestive related maladies, I kept chalking them up to hold-overs from the flu I'd had.

But as I read the article again and again, I began to let myself connect up my symptoms with what I'd felt in the past. And the more introspection I did, the more I realized that the "monster" I had thought I had vanquished hadn't been done away with. It had only been knocked out for a while.

"Even with surgery, however, endometriosis is difficult to diagnose because it can take on different colors and shapes, and can be hidden.
"'It's more like if you got up in the morning and the bed sheets are all messed up and there's a quarter in there. It's easy to miss it," [Dr. Andrew] Cook said. "There are folds and tissue and the bowel gets down in there. You've got to basically pull the bed sheets straight and make sure you see everything.'
"As a result, a woman can wait nearly a decade or longer before being diagnosed with endometriosis, according to a survey of 4,000 North American women conducted by the Endometriosis Association."

I had gone for over 20 years before being diagnosed, so the "messed up bed sheets" in my body were far worse. Five years ago, my doc had me in surgery for cyst removal and a hysterectomy, not for what she found. She'd most likely left enough "quarters" for a whole party of kids to have a hey day at Chuck E. Cheese.

Great.

As I hunted the internet using keywords like "post hysterectomy endometriosis" I was given a rude awakening with new information about my disease that my doctor hadn't told me about 5 years ago.

From Heather Guidone, Surgical Program Director, Center for Endometriosis Care:

"Endometriosis persists after hysterectomy because hysterectomy removes organs, not necessarily disease. Any implants left behind in the abdomen will continue to thrive in their own self-sustaining life cycle (it matters not if the ovaries are removed), because the implants themselves produce an estrogen-synthesizing enzyme called Aromatase.

"The key to successful treatment of Endometriosis lies in true excision, which the surgical dissection and meticulous removal of all disease - from all locations, including bowel, bladder, etc., which many surgeons are reluctant to treat and simply leave behind. True specialists, however... are able to intervene laparoscopically and thoroughly eradicate all disease.

"Endometriosis recurs after hysterectomy in women who did not have the disease excised in more than 40% of cases within 5 yrs. [Accreditation HealthCare Commission stats]."

Double great.

I'm pretty certain what my body is feeling and trying to tell me. And the thought of going back to where I was before Halloween 2005 makes me want to run far away to a tropical island to lay in a hammock for the rest of my life (something Hubby isn't going to let me do).

To complicate matters even more (if that's possible), I no longer have the same healthcare coverage I did 5 years ago. I'm now a Kaiser Permanente patient which means the majority of my care must come from one of their facilities unless it's something so specialized that they don't have the facilities to treat it. It also means that my entire surgical history is outside the Kaiser system.

It just gets better and better, doesn't it?

This past week, I've spent most of my time emailing my Kaiser GYN about referrals, filling out the forms necessary to get my entire 2005 surgical file in my own possession (something I should have done a long time ago), and battling a blasted cold that decided now was the perfect time to infect me.

The good news is that my doctor has already sent through a referral to the recently formed Chronic Pelvic Pain Clinic at our local Kaiser facility, and I've already heard back from the clinic that I'm on the waiting list to be seen. I've also been told that they deal almost exclusively with endometriosis cases.

While I wait for Kaiser, I'm pursuing getting a second opinion from Dr. Andrew Cook (the doc quoted in the article above) who is here in the San Francisco Bay Area. The only problem is he isn't covered through my healthcare. Still, I feel strongly that I need a specialist with his expertise to take a look at my case. Once I have my 2005 file in my hot little hands, I'll be going to see Dr. Cook.

In the meantime, I'm trying to ignore the discomfort I'm feeling almost constantly now. If I focus on the positive and give myself permission to rest as needed, I'll get through this much easier... at least that's what Hubby keeps telling me.

A blast to the past... G.I. Joe PSA's below

Video Games | | All GI Joe PSAs

XBox 360 | Playstation 3 | Nintendo Wii

Of all places, why the mall?

2009-04-07T22:02:00.000-07:00

One of my absolute favorite treats is peach frozen yogurt at Berry Twist. I'm a purist... I don't get any toppings (although Hubby does)--just lovely, unspoiled, peachy frozen goodness for me.

Here's the problem... Berry Twist is in the mall--a place I dread. Hopping with teens looking for their next crush and fashionistas dressed to be seen, the mall isn't the place I want to go when I need my peach frozen yogurt the most--when I'm feeling crappy and gross. The times when I least want to get dressed in real clothes are also the times when I most want this delectable treat. I can't just pull my hair back, pull on something other than my jammies and go through a drive-thru somewhere. Nope. When I need the soothing coolness of peach yogurt sliding down my throat, I have to also muster up the courage to dress to the nines, brave the mall parking lot and the escalator to procure said yogurt.

It all makes me very tired. I wonder if Berry Twist knows how much business they'd have if they weren't in the mall.

From Grammy's Recipe Box: Temperature in Cooking

2009-02-28T14:30:00.000-08:00

Managing Depression and Anxiety With Nutrition

2009-02-12T16:01:00.000-08:00

Originally published in 2007, I am publishing this again for those that may have missed it the first time

I'm a research junkie. I admit it. I own it. I'm okay with it.

I'm okay with it because it is the reason why I have found wonderful answers to my personal health issues. As I've taken the facts I've gleaned from various sources and put them all together into one whole just for me, I've found a great deal of relief from the maladies that biology has left me to face.

One such issue is my struggle with anxiety and depression combined (the official diagnosis from the doc was "OCD depression"). It seems to run in our family because as I've compared notes with relatives, we all manifest our issues in similar ways, and our genetic predecessors did as well for at least two generations back. The genetic cards I've been dealt haven't been an easy hand to play during life. But the bottom line seems to be a lack of serotonin in my system.

What is Serotonin?
Serotonin is the wonderful chemical that the brain uses to make electrical connections between brain cells so they can talk to one another. The serotonin serves like "wires"or "electrical conduits" for the electrical impulses to travel on. Called a neurotransmitter, serotonin is used to regulate lots of stuff in the body. It helps your brain to tell your heart to beat, to remind you to breathe, to tell your stomach and intestines to digest food. It's also used to regulate your mood.

The Limbic Center
About the size of a walnut, the limbic center of the brain is right in the core of the brain and is where all the "warm-fuzzies" get processed. It's where emotional attachments are processed. Women have a slightly bigger limbic than men which accounts for their ability to bond and for that in-born "mothering instinct". The limbic is where mood is handled and processed. Brain scans (pioneered by Dr. Daniel Amen) have shown that someone in a sad or depressed mood has a limbic that looks bright and "lit up" on a brain-activity scan, while someone that is in a fairly good mood has a limbic that doesn't light up nearly as much. The "hotter" the limbic runs the worse the person's mood usually is at the time of the scan. Just like a car radiator, the limbic can't run hot all the time without having adverse effects on every other function around it and connected to it. Just as a car radiator that overheats for too long eventually will result in a warped engine head, so too a limbic that overheats too long and too often will result in a "warped head".

Shortage of Serotonin
My body has a shortage of serotonin on a regular basis. For whatever reason, my body doesn't produce enough. Because my brain has a shortage of it, it uses the serotonin it does have for the critical functions first (i.e., keeping my heart beating). It then parses out the rest to other functions putting mood-regulation lowest on the priority list. So my brain has a tendency to run "hot" all the time because there's a lack of the "coolant" serotonin.

Getting More Serotonin into My Brain
The body is just amazing! It can take a complex carbohydrate food like whole wheat bread and in only a few digestive steps convert it into serotonin! Amazing! So for me, if I'm having an issue with anxiety I can eat a piece of whole wheat bread, a few Triscuits, or a yummy plate of whole grain nachos (pictured at right--see recipe at bottom). In about 20-30 minutes my mood feels more calm. If I remember to consume complex carbs throughout my day at regular intervals, I am able to regulate my anxiety much better. Conversely, if I eat a low-carb diet, I'm a bear to live with!

Nutritional "Supplements"
The work of both Dr. Christiane Northrup and Dr. Daniel Amen have been key for me to manage my serotonin imbalance issues as well. I take a multi-vitamin daily as well as a the following additional "supplements":

Vitamin C

Magnesium

Omega-3

Folic Acid

Vitamin D

30 min. daily of natural sunlight or light from a full-spectrum light bulb

Consciously and frequently think about something that makes my insides say "ahhhh" like baby kittens

Sing to myself and let myself dance

Give myself permission to take a nap when I need to nap

I don't consume foods that have anything "hydrogenated" in the ingredient list

I won't go into the reasons why all the above "supplements" are biologically necessary, but they all assist important functions in my body to help me feel better emotionally (and physically).

Medicinal Supplementation
I have a fairly severe issue with serotonin imbalance, so I also take a prescription medication that falls into the class of serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs). This class of meds works like a dam in a river. It prevents my body from reabsorbing the little serotonin that it does produce and creates a reservoir for my body to utilize for the lower priority functions that it would otherwise short-change if I didn't take the SSRI. There are number of SSRIs in this class of medications. I've been on 3 different ones over the past 12+ years. Each has it's benefits. Eventually, I found the right fit for my particular brain chemistry which allows me to take a small dose and still get all the benefits of the additional seratonin available to my brain.

The Bottom line
For me, tackling anxiety and depression required a multi-faceted approach--counseling, medication, and nutrition. Nutrition is a major facet of the three. It is easy to slack off on nutrition, but if I do I feel it. I've found that if I "feed" my body and my brain with the right nutrition (including exposure to sunlight), my issues are very manageable and my life is much more fulfilling and rewarding.

Healthy Nachos (6 points)
15 whole grain tortilla chips from Trader Joe's (Salsa Fresca flavor is great!)
1/2 can of fat-free refried beans
1 oz. sharp cheddar cheese
optional carmelized white vidalia onions (I use leftovers from other dishes)

Lay out the tortilla chips in one layer with edges slightly overlapping onto a microwave-safe plate. Put spoonfuls of refried beans evenly spaced over layer of chips. Hand-grate cheddar cheese over top. To regulate the amount, I put the entire plate onto my kitchen scale before putting the cheese on, zero out the weight, and then grate the cheese on until the scale reads 1 oz. Place optional onions over the top. Microwave the plate of nachos for 60-90 seconds on high. Enjoy with a cool glass of water!

Homegrown Winter Citrus

2009-01-19T19:58:00.000-08:00

I've unexpectedly become a fan of growing citrus in our garden. One of the reasons why is that I'm able to have fresh lemons at my fingertips year-round (thanks to the Eureka lemon that can bloom, produce, and ripen all at the same time). Hubby is able to take a couple of lemons off the tree whenever he wants to make up a great vinaigrette or some pan-sauteed lemon chicken.

Eureka lemons
(January 2009)

I've also become a passionate fan of my little Kinnow Mandarin tree. The fruit ripens in winter beginning in December. The fruit will stay sweet and good on the tree for weeks so I enjoy going out and picking one or two for each of us as a treat. When it's nice outside, I like to sit outside to eat my little orb of sweetness.

Kinnow Mandarins
(January 2009)

Our collection of citrus has grown in the last 6 months with the addition of a blood orange, a summer orange, a navel orange, and a Valencia. I am hoping that they too will become favorites.

Growing Organic Winter Greens

2008-12-22T16:54:00.001-08:00

Some of you may remember when I posted about putting in a new raised bed just outside our front door for our winter garden (it was back in October). Well, today I realized that I hadn't posted any updates about it and thought it was high time I did.

I have been pleasantly surprised at how well all the seeds have done. I'm usually not very good at growing stuff from seed, but this time I did something right. Tah-dah!

I do the "cut-and-come-again" method of harvesting lettuce so this 4'x8' raised planter has been providing us with WONDERFUL salad greens for about a month. And it's still going strong! It's great to have Hubby say, "I'm making chinese chicken salad. Can you go harvest some lettuce?" And I walk right out the front door with the salad spinner bowl in hand, pick the greens I want, and bring them back inside to be prepped by Hubby.

Don't let all this greenery fool you into thinking that it's warm here, because it isn't. There's a daytime chill in the air and our overnight temps often dip below freezing. Lettuce and other winter greens love this kind of weather. They produce buttery tasting leaves that simply melt in your mouth.

Intermingled among the rows of lettuce are other winter veggies such as broccoli, scallions, parsley, and snap peas. I also planted a row of bread seed poppies that are doing very well and getting big enough that they will hopefully bloom soon. Once they've gone to seed, we'll harvest the poppy seeds for garnishing bread and other things.

I think the most exciting thing about this whole endeavor (other than the fact that the seeds grew), is that I've been able to grow everything without the use of any pesticides, herbicides, or snail/slug bait. The only deterrent I've used is some metal fencing material I had. It has kept the neighborhood kitties and other critters out of the soil.

I really don't know exactly how many varieties of lettuce are growing right now. There must be at least 7-8 different ones. There were some seed packets that were mixes of winter greens, so it's hard to say. Regardless, all of them are yummy in their wholesome freshness. I wish I could share some with each of you!

San Francisco's Slow Food Nation '08 Garden

2008-09-22T13:22:00.001-07:00

Last Saturday Hubby, my mom, and I drove into San Francisco to see the Ming exhibit at the Asian Art Museum. The museum is located in the heart of the civic area of San Francisco, and one can see the beautiful historic San Francisco City Hall from the steps of the museum. As we drove by City Hall to park and go into the museum, my gardening sensibilities were intrigued by the sight of the pedestrian mall directly in front of San Francisco City Hall--it was blooming in sunflowers!

After visiting the museum, I told Mom and Hubby that I HAD to go and see the sunflowers in front of City Hall. So we walked the short distance and found that not only were there sunflowers, but there was an entire vegetable and flower garden covering the space. The garden was planted as part of Slow Food Nation '08. Hubby and Mom sat on one of the many burlap-covered hay bale benches while I slowly meandered through the garden with camera in hand.

Butterflies, honeybees, bumblebees, and birds all flitted about in the garden that felt like an oasis in the urban center of San Francisco. The juxtaposition of the large produce garden against the bustle of urbanity was striking. It made for some really fun shots. And it also drove home to me once again, that it doesn't matter where a garden is, nature will find it and thrive.

The following are some of my favorite shots from a delightful afternoon...

Sunflowers in front of San Francisco City Hall

The juxtaposition of pollinators (Tithonia Mexican sunflower) against the background of city life

The large round beds alternated with pollinator flowers and edible produce

California Poppies slipped over the burlap berms that formed the large round planter beds

A non-traditional pink California Poppy caught my eye because it was so striking

The round bales of straw that served as a fence around the garden were
a favorite of the birds looking for nesting material

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The Strawberries Just Keep Coming

2008-09-12T10:48:00.000-07:00

The most prolific strawberry plants are growing in a tiered terra cotta herb/strawberry pot which could easily be grown on any balcony, terrace, patio, or probably even inside by a sunny window. There's nothing better than fresh strawberries!

The Pomegranates are Ripening...

2008-09-09T23:54:00.000-07:00

...and I still don't have any really cool recipes for anything with pomegranates. Does anyone know of a good pomegranate vinaigrette recipe they'd like to share? How about maybe a pomegranate bread recipe? Please post or email your great pomegranate recipes so we can make the most of our wonderful crop this year.

Mom's Coffee Cake

2008-09-08T15:23:00.000-07:00

Have you ever wondered why a cake that has no coffee in it continues to be called "coffee cake"?

I never did, until Hubby brought it to my attention after we got married. I grew up eating my mom's coffee cake and never questioned the name--just like I never questioned the reason why we called the piece of furniture in front of our sofa a "coffee table". It just "was". Who cared that we never drank coffee? It was just "coffee cake".

Yesterday, thanks to a post I read on Middle of Nowhere on an empty stomach, I developed a hankering for a great crumb cake. The only thing I could think of from that point on, was my mom's coffee cake. So I broke down and made some.

I decided to make it in a square pyrex dish instead of a 9x13 pan. That made for a longer cooking time then prescribed by the recipe, but it finally baked all the way through and I had a wonderful taste from my past.

Mom's Coffee Cake

Combine the following dry ingredients:

3 cups flour
1 1/2 cups sugar
4 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt

Mix well and set aside.

Combine the following wet ingredients in a separate bowl:

1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 1/4 cup milk
2 beaten eggs

Mix the wet mixture well.

Add the wet mixture to the dry mixture. Mix well. Pour into a greased and floured 9x13 pan or pyrex dish.

Prepare the topping in a separate bowl by combining the following ingredients:

1/2 cup brown sugar
2 Tbsp flour
2 tsp cinnamon
2 Tbsp butter

Mix until crumbly. Dot and crumble the topping mixture over top of the batter.

Bake at 350 F for 25-30 minutes until a test toothpick (or other probe) comes out clean.

The cake is a moist and dense crumb cake that isn't overly sweet in order to balance out the sweetness of the crumble topping. It can be eaten hot or cold (it's really good the day after baking). I don't know how many calories are in it, and I don't want to know. Sometimes, I just need a taste of being a kid again.

Mom! The Watermelon's Making Faces At Me Again!

2008-09-08T15:14:00.000-07:00

Did You Know Your Fridge is "An Aladdin's Lamp"? Part 2

2008-09-05T11:42:00.000-07:00

If you haven't read Part 1,
I highly recommend that you do so
before reading this post which is Part 2.
You can read Part 1 by clicking here.

Continuing on through the reading that is helping me gain a better appreciation for my refrigerator, the next section of the book helped me realize just how new the home refrigerator was to the homemaker of 1927 when this book was published.

Click on the image below to enlarge for reading

Chilled fruit for breakfast; frozen ice cubes in water; firm butter squares or balls; crisp salads and frozen desserts... all were a novelty that one didn't usually enjoy at home. That is, until the home refrigerator came along. When I read this, I try to get into the head of the homemaker that suddenly had vast culinary horizons opened to her. How must that have been?

I've seen a lot of technological advances in my own lifetime, and the advent of the microwave oven is the only thing that I can think of in my personal experience that would be akin to the advent of the refrigerator for these women. I remember the first microwave oven we purchased for the family when I was 11 or 12 years old. I remember all of us huddling around it to witness the phenomenon of being able to boil a cup water in a minute. It was miraculous! The culinary possibilities seemed endless!

That's how it must have been for these women (and their families) that were being guided by this book (and others like it) through the uncharted waters of home refrigeration. The culinary possibilities must have seemed endless.

Did You Know Your Fridge is "An Aladdin's Lamp"?

2008-09-05T11:11:00.000-07:00

A couple of years ago, I was fortunate enough to acquire a vintage recipe book that was originally published in 1927 by the General Electric Company entitled "Electric Refrigerator Recipes and Menus: Specially prepared for the General Electric Refrigerator". It's a hardcover book and the original price printed on the title page reads "Price Two Dollars". I was pleased to find that it was authored by a Miss Alice Bradley whose is credited as being "Principal of Miss Farmer's School of Cookery, Cooking Editor of Woman's Home Companion, Author of : Cooking for Profit, Candy Cook Book, For Luncheon and Supper Guests" (that's some resume!).

What is so charming and wonderful about this book is how it instantly transports me back in time to the perspective of the "modern American homemaker" of the late-1920's and what new horizons she was enjoying with the invention and availability of home refrigeration.

I am so charmed by this, that I hope you'll indulge me over the next few posts as I share my reading with all of you. And since the original print is what lends it much of its charm, instead of re-typing the text I've decided to share scans of the original pages with you.

Click on the image to read it in an enlarged size

See what I mean? Reading these words has caused me to reflect on how much we take for granted in the kitchen. To the homemaker of the late 1920's, a fridge was "an Aladdin's lamp" and "a form of health and happiness insurance" for her family. Nowadays we just take that big square thing in the kitchen for granted. Who knew it was such a magical thing? Apparently our grandmothers did!

Click here to read Part 2 in this series

A Braver Woman Than I

2008-09-03T11:07:00.001-07:00

"The recipe was simple and I loved the vintage(?) feel of how it was written. I'm not sure how old Grammy was when she made marshmallows, but I kind of picture her making these in the 50's, wearing cateye glasses and saddle shoes, maybe while watching I Love Lucy."

Here's how vintage the recipe truly is... it was written in fountain pen by my great-great-aunt Esther sometime between 1910 and 1930-ish.

The way I can date this recipe is that some of the other recipes my Grammy's box are actually dated with Esther's name in the top right corner. This undated recipe looks like those dated ones so that's how I can zero in on a date. I can imagine that Esther probably jotted down a lot of the recipes that her niece, Elsie (my Grammy) would have witnessed Esther making and fallen in love with. Elsie probably made this recipe from that time forward into the 50's (and beyond) as Emiline envisioned.

And those cat-eye glasses and saddle shoes Emiline envisioned? Well, I don't think Grammy wore saddle shoes BUT here is a photo of little me wearing my Grammy's cat-eye glasses! I loved her glasses (she had more than one pair) because she always got the really snazzy ones--some with little rhinestones.

As for watching "I Love Lucy" while making the recipe? Well, that would have been problematic because as that show was being watched by most households in the U.S., my Grammy was living in the Indian Valley nestled in the northern woods of California where TV signals didn't really reach until the 60's. She would have been accompanied by radio if anything.

Grammy probably also made this recipe at an earlier time when she lived in the San Francisco Bay Area during the thriving and bustling 20's, 30's, and 40's. Here are two great photos of my Grammy Elsie outside her place of work at a grocer's in downtown Oakland in the 1930's. She's the one sitting on the curb in the first photo...

Yup, my Grammy was a stylish marshmallow-making woman! And now that honor belongs to Emiline at Sugar Plum. Way to go, Emiline!!!!!!

Refrigerator Bread and Butter Pickle Chips

2008-09-02T07:00:00.000-07:00

Since we had a generous harvest of cucumbers this year (one of which was hooked over into a round fat "U" shape), Hubby decided to try his hand at making some homemade pickles. Hubby researched various recipes online and then created his own hybrid recipes of all of them. The recipe is as follows:

8 cups thinly sliced fresh cucumbers
1 medium onion
1 red bell pepper
2 cups sugar
2 cups distilled white vinegar
1 tsp Kosher salt (do NOT use iodized salt)
1 tsp mustard seed
1 tsp celery seed
1 tsp ground turmeric (for color)
1 tsp ground cloves
8-10 whole peppercorns

Slice cucumbers, onion, and bell pepper and set aside in large bowl. Combine remainder of ingredients in a medium saucepan and heat over medium-high heat, stirring occasionally until sugar dissolves and mixture is at a slow boil. Shut off heat immediately. Combine heated mixture with vegetables in the large bowl and let cool to room temperature. When cooled, transfer to an airtight container and store in refrigerator for at least 24 hours before serving. Will keep in refrigerator for up to 3 weeks (but it won't last that long).

Hubby is the pickle fan in the household so he's the one that can offer an official opinion on how they turned out. Hubby says:

"The pickles are sweet--but not too sweet. The peppercorns add a nice little bit of heat along with the slight edge of the red bell pepper. These pickles taste much fresher than the pickles you find at the grocery store. Of course, you can't beat the crunch. They're very crunchy. They would be great on hamburgers although they're tasty right out of the container. It was a grand experiment that actually worked this time. That's all I have to say about that..."

Apparently, Hubby is the Forrest Gump of pickle making.

My Favorite Healthy Snack

2008-09-01T14:32:00.001-07:00

I've been a big lover of Triscuits ever since I was very young. It's probably because the complex carbs in Triscuits help to keep my seratonin levels up so I'm in a great mood. I usually ate them plain as a kid. Then I later acquired a taste for them with a hearty slice of extra sharp cheddar on them.

Two years ago, when I adopted a WeightWatchers based lifestyle I had to cut down on the cheddar. It was back to eating plain Triscuits (7 of them equals 2 WeightWatchers points)... that is until I discovered The Laughing Cow cheeses!

The Laughing Cow Light cheese wedges are only 35 calories each with 2g of fat per wedge. One spreadable wedge is sufficient for me to have cheese on every one of my 7 Triscuits. And they are oh-so-yummy!

The packaging reads:

"A Taste of France!
'La vache qui rit' (The Laughing Cow) cheese has been a French favorite from the dairy-rich Jura Mountains since 1921."

The Laughing Cow cheeses come in a variety of flavors of which I've tried three--original swiss, garlic and herb, and french onion. My favorite is the garlic and herb with a french onion in close second only because it's harder to find than the garlic and herb. We like to buy the value 3-pack that has a total of 24 spreadable cheese wedges (8 in each round "wheel").

Don't be turned off by the word "Light" either. I can't taste the difference between the "Light" and the "Original Creamy" that only comes in the swiss flavor. So if you haven't tried them, I strongly recommend that you do.

Click on the nutrition table above to enlarge

The Secret to Organic Strawberries

2008-08-29T12:41:00.000-07:00

In a previous post, I posted a photo of a small bowl of freshly picked strawberries just before I handed the bowl over to Hubby so he could enjoy their juicy yumminess.

Since that post, I've thought a lot about strawberries and how they start in this world--as a humble non-assuming little white blossom. And if they get pollinated correctly by the bees and other flying critters, those blossoms become strawberries.

I've also thought a lot about the use of the word "organic" that has become so popular in describing how food is grown or produced. After maintaining an organic kitchen garden (potager) for over 7 years now, I have to let everyone in on a big secret. "Organic" is really easy! It was the non-organic method that was much harder.

Early on in my foray into growing organic fruits and vegetables for our own consumption, I read an article about the centuries old method of companion planting that is now gaining a resurgence starting as a grass-roots level. The premise is that certain plants are planted next to one another so they benefit each other based on what bugs they attract or repel, what nutrients they use, they're growing habits, and even the essence of their pollen in the case of companions like basil and tomatoes (tomatoes take on a wonderful taste with the essence of basil if planted next to it). This concept means that a vegetable and fruit garden not only looks better with flowers intermingled in it, but it is healthier.

My own experience has been that I have not needed to use pesticides for 7 years. That's right... NONE! Why? Because of the flowers and plants I purposefully planted in the vicinity of the strawberry plants that grow in pots right next to the 1200 gallon pond in the near center of my garden (you can see the strawberry pots in the background of the photo below).

Now what are these "magical" plants that grow next to the strawberries? Simple bright red canna lilies, lemon balm, and fennel. Well, those don't seem all that special, right? But they are to the strawberries. Here's why...

The bright red canna lilies and fennel attract lots of large predator insects that eat the smaller insects that would otherwise dine on the strawberries. The red canna lilies also attract hummingbirds. Hummingbirds, although partial to the sugary nectar of flowers, get most of their calorie intake from small insects like spiders, mites, gnats and mosquitos. The strawberries benefit again. The lemon balm that's great on sauted chicken breasts, also helps in the same way and gives off a strong enough odor that it camoflages other more vulnerable plants around it. A lot of herbs do this.

See how easy "organic" can be? I just plant things next to each other, water them, and they take care of each other. Really amazing, isn't it?!?! Don't let all the hype or the higher prices of "organic" fool you into believing that you can't grow things this way yourself. If you haven't, just trust me a teensy bit and take the plunge... grow some of your own produce. It's easier on the pocketbook, tastes phenomenal, and it's good for you.

From Grammy's recipe box: Vintage Sunkist Recipes

2008-08-28T16:50:00.000-07:00

Click here for Grape Juice Lemonade
Click here for Sunkist Lemonade
Click here for Sunkist Orangeade

Kettle Korn With Only 100 Calories!

2008-08-27T17:15:00.000-07:00

That's right... 100 calories! If you didn't already know, Orville Redenbacher makes a "Smart Pop!" popcorn with the wonderful sweetness of kettle-corn popcorn without the guilt. Each mini bag is 94% fat free and is perfect for a one-person snack.

I like to have mine in the evening while I'm watching TV or a DVD when I feel a need for something crunchy and/or something sweet.

It pops up very evenly in the microwave. I use the pre-set for a small bag of popcorn, and I have yet to have a torched batch.

The Smart Pop! Kettle Korn is also available in bigger bags if you want to pop up some for more than one person (of course it'll be more than 100 calories).

Here the nutrition breakdown for a mini bag straight from the product site:

Nothing Better Than...

2008-08-25T00:55:00.000-07:00

...freshly picked homegrown organic strawberries from the garden. Yum!

Not Brave Enough for Homemade Marshmallow

2008-08-22T12:07:00.000-07:00

2 T gelatine
1/2 c cold water

Cook the following ingredients to 236 degrees F or until it threads about the length of the arm:

2 c sugar
3/4 c boiling water
1/8 t salt

Pour syrup slowly over gelatine, beating constantly until thick and cool (about 20 min.). Flavor as desired. Color. Butter a shallow pan slightly and dust with powdered sugar. Turn the mixture out on this and smooth top evenly. Dust with powdered sugar. Let stand overnight. Cut in squares. Roll in sugar.

Variations:
Chopped nuts, figs, raisins, or candied cherries may be added to the recipe. Plain marshmallow may be cooled in cocoa-nut before dipping in sugar, or dipped in melted chocolate.

From Blossom to Cuke

2008-08-22T11:53:00.000-07:00

The cucumber vines are in full swing here in our garden. I think what I love most about gardening is the chance it gives me to see the cycle of life in all its forms. My cucumber vines are affording me that delight right now. Early blossoms have now formed into cucumbers of all sizes while the vines still put out delightful yellow blossoms. From beginning to end, I find the cucumber a fascinating and beautiful thing.

And Hubby doesn't know yet that this is now in the fridge. He'll be so happy!

Breakfast of this "Champion"

2008-08-21T12:04:00.000-07:00

First off, although this post isn't going to be a "bare all" post per se, it is going to be a post that is brutally honest. You have now been fairly warned...

My doctor says that I have "classic OCD depression". That was probably a contributing factor to me developing an eating disorder at about the age of 10 years old that was anorexic/bulimic in nature as it involved starvation/extreme dieting (for more of the story click here).

Even at the age of 41 years old, I still find myself shunning food throughout the daylight hours just because I'm completely interested in something else that seems more "fun". And trust me... this behavior hasn't made me skinny AT ALL. In fact, quite the opposite, because my metabolism has slowed down so dramatically from decades of being in "starvation mode". It is a sad fact (confirmed by my doc) that I probably will never see my ideal weight. Despite great strides on my part over the past 2 years to eat nutritiously and to eat the proper amount of food throughout the day, I have lost only a fraction of the amount of weight that I would need to lose to be my "ideal" weight. It's a reality that I'm still coming to grips with.

Even though my intelligent mind knows all of this, I struggle with my OCD as soon as I wake up in the morning. All the possibilities for the day race through my head at lightning speed. And none of those possibilities includes eating breakfast or lunch. If I'm not careful, I could go until about 4 or 5 o'clock in the afternoon, and then come to the realization that the reason why I feel nauseated is because I haven't eaten anything all day. Interestingly, the only time I'm interested in eating food is after 5 o'clock in the evening (still haven't figured out that one).

Anyway... for me, breakfast has to be as quick as possible or it won't get consumed. Fortunately, there is something wonderful called "Carnation Instant Breakfast". I can mix it and drink it in less than 5 minutes and still get the nutrients I need for the beginning of my day. It would be much better if I would sit down and have a healthy whole-grain "something" with an organic "something" on the side and maybe a cup of nutritious "something" as a chaser but I know myself better than that. I know that if I self impose that sort of requirement I'll just end of "forgetting" to eat in lieu of going off and doing something else more "fun"--gardening, art, design, writing, computer geek stuff, vacuuming... anything but eating.

Now if only someone made "instant lunch" then I'd be set. ;)

"Yummy" In A Different Way

2008-08-19T16:14:00.000-07:00

I've been completely submerged in design work as of late so the kitchen has been Hubby's territory for the past couple of days. That means no "sinful" treats are getting made and photographed. I call Hubby my "personal chef" because he makes dinner every night, and culinary creations are always amazingly delicious as well as very healthy. He's a Type 2 diabetic and I have high cholesterol so he's really good about cooking foods that are good for us. The food is so delicious you'd never know it.

So the "yummy" things I have to share today come from my design world where I can design and paint all the "sinful" treats I want and not worry at all whether it's healthy or not.

Like these scrumptious looking maraschino cherries on Keds sneakers (click on the image to see it larger):

Or the decadent goodness of this calorie-free chocolate candy (click on images to see larger):

There are perks to be a designer. I can indulge in all the treats without dealing with the aftermath. It's great!

Good Enough to Eat

2008-08-18T14:28:00.000-07:00

A new collection of my photographs is on display at the Rosehaven Cottage Art Gallery entitled "Beautiful Produce".

Being a photographer as well as gardener who grows produce in my garden has opened my eyes to the simple beauty of produce on the branch or vine and produce that has been been harvested. I regularly walk my gardens at various times throughout the year, as our climate allows us to have a year-round produce garden. As I walk the garden looking for the minute changes from one day to the next, it always fascinates me how beautiful nature can be in its simple colors, textures, and forms. In particular, what I find striking is the beauty of the produce that we eventually eat. The phrase "looks good enough to eat" has takes on new dimensions for me as I have realized that what we do end up eating has an amazing beauty all its own.

In this collection, I have tried to capture the beautiful simplicity of fruit and vegetable produce without post-production enhancement in order to show the subjects as they appeared in reality when photographed. The light I've used is always available light. When I've shot these photographs, it's been just me, my camera and the beautiful produce.

When A Zucchini Gets Away From You

2008-08-15T17:52:00.000-07:00

This is another contribution from Grammy's recipe box. I inherited this recipe box as a young girl when my Grammy passed away from ovarian cancer. Over the years, I have cherished its contents. Some recipes date back to my Grammy's mother El and Grammy's aunt Esther in the 1910-20's. If you use a recipe or cooking tip from Grammy's recipe box, I'd love to hear about it.

To see more of Grammy's recipes, click on the "Grammy's recipe box" label at the end of this post.

It's my fault. I was the one on "zucchini watch", and I failed in my duties. I failed to check the zucchini yesterday, and it got too big (as zucchini will do).

So what do you do if your zucchini gets away from you?

We decided to try a vintage recipe, "Stuffed Zucchini", out of my Grammy's recipe box. The recipe had been cut out of a magazine and looks like it's circa 1960s-1970s.

Hubby did the preparing on this one and found the recipe to be very easy to follow (which is a pleasant bonus when making a vintage recipe).

Here's what the recipe says (with our editorial comments in red italics):

Stuffed Zucchini
No browning or boiling, just bake and serve.

2 pounds zucchini [obviously, we just had one BIG one!]
1/2 pound ground beef
1/4 cup mayonnaise
2 teaspoons dehydrated onion flakes [Hubby used French's Fried Onions instead]
2 teaspoons dried parsley flakes
1 teaspoon oregano leaves
1 teaspoon salt [definitely needed more]
1 teaspoon lemon juice
1/4 teaspoon pepper
2/3 cup spaghetti sauce [Hubby used Prego traditional]

Halve zucchini. Scoop out centers leaving 1/4-inch shell; place in shallow baking dish. Coarsely chop zucchini centers; mix with next 8 ingredients. Spoon into shells. Top with sauce. Bake in 350 degrees F in oven for 30 minutes. Serves 4. [If you use 2 pounds of zucchini]

In the future, Hubby suggests that browning the ground beef would be better. Why? Because brown food tastes better!!!! And it would also reduce baking time.

Hubby said that the baking aroma brought back memories of his grandmother's kitchen because culinary creations of this kind were common during the 1960s. After baking was over, Hubby let it cool a bit since it came out of the oven the temperature of "hot magma".

Once it had cooled a bit, the tasting commenced. The flavor of the sauce against the filling mixture was good, but it definitely needed more salt. Once Hubby pumped up the salt, the flavor came alive. Hubby said it's not something that he would be addicted to, but it is most definitely a great quick meal option for using up zucchini from the garden--particularly zucchini that's gotten out-of-control huge!

Got Leftover Mashed Potatoes? Bake A Cake!

2008-08-14T19:16:00.000-07:00

"They sure knew what they were doing back then... Nice chocolate flavor and then you get the cloves... That's good! The cloves thing kinda stays with you... And now I want more... And they're fluffy and moist... It tastes very autumnal!"

The cake is a hit! It is a very dense cake although moist and fluffy (and Hubby said). I'm sure that it would work well in a bundt pan best. The cupcakes have the weight of light muffins.

Now what to do about an icing and filling...

I dug through the recipe box and found another recipe for "Caramel Icing & Frosting". It sounded like a possible match. The recipe reads:

1 1/2 cup brown sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
4 tablespoons milk
1 teaspoon butter
Put sugar in saucepan, add milk and stir until dissolved. Boil 3 minutes. Take from fire, add butter. Turn into a cold bowl and beat until creamy. Add vanilla. May add chopped nuts.

I followed the recipe as written. Everything was going along fine until I started beating the mixture to make it creamy. The mixture started to cool and become more of the consistency of real caramel candy!

Thinking quickly, I decided to add a little more milk and a little more butter. That solved the problem but it was more of the consistency of a glaze then the filling I needed. Realizing that the fat content of our 2 % milk is almost assuredly lower than the fat content of the milk Aunt Esther used, I added a bit of half-and-half, whipped it for a few minutes, and then I added a full cup of powdered sugar. That made the consistency more like a filling I could use with the mini cakes.

With the mini cakes cooled and the caramel icing/filling fixed, I filled the wells of the mini cakes, stacked the two layers, iced the whole little cake, and then put it in the refrigerator to chill. Then I garnished it with whole walnuts (Hubby can easily pick those off).

Both Hubby and I agree that the combination of the flavors, spice and caramel, are a perfect match. Yum! But I'm sure that there are a lot of other combinations you could think up for this classic vintage recipe. Let me know if you come with one and make it. I'd love to hear what you paired Aunt Esther's "Potato Cake" with. I still can't believe it has leftover mashed potatoes in it.

Call for Pomegranate Recipes

2008-08-13T12:58:00.001-07:00

We are going to have another wonderful crop of pomegranates this year off our very prolific bush. As you can see in the photo at left, the fruit is beginning to blush nicely and soon it will be time to harvest.

Here's the problem...

We've never made anything with the pomegranates before! We usually just give them away whole to my mom, my niece, and my nephew who just eat them straight from the fruit (they love the sour little punch). But there's only so many pomegranates they can eat.

So we're putting a call out to all of you for any great pomegranate recipes that you just love. Help us make the most of our fresh pomegranates that will be ripening in a month or so. We'll be making up the best recipes and featuring them here with a link back to the contributor of the recipe.

If you'd prefer to email your recipe offline just send it to rosehaven_cottage @ yahoo dot com.

In the Mood for Chocolate Candy

2008-08-12T16:35:00.001-07:00

I must be in a very chocolate-y mood today because I've got chocolate on my mind in a serious way! So much so, that I created a new dimensional art piece devoted to chocolate candy.

Great! Now I want to go to See's and get a box of caramels!

This piece of shadowbox art
is currently on sale at my Etsy store.

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An Unexpected Harvest

2008-08-11T20:16:00.000-07:00

Hubby and I ventured out into the garden this evening as the sun was setting. Hubby had just arrived home from working late. I hadn't gone out in the garden all day because I was avoiding the oppressive heat. I wasn't anticipating finding anything to harvest. I had just been out there day before yesterday and taken all the good stuff in--or so I thought.

I am on self-appointed "zucchini watch" and still didn't expect to find a zucchini that was big enough to harvest. Then I found the overly large cucumber that appeared from who-knows-where. And where in the world did all these pole beans come from?

While I harvested the green things, Hubby went around the tomato plants picking sun-ripened tomatoes--his favorite treat of all time, I think. I'm not quite sure how many Sweet 100 tomatoes ended up in his mouth and how many made it inside.

Regardless, there will be fresh veggies on the menu this evening and that makes my sweet husband very happy. Being a Type 2 diabetic is a real downer unless he has something to look forward to and fresh veggies fit the bill.

From Grammy's Recipe Box: "Chocolate Creams"

2008-08-01T19:04:00.003-07:00

This is another contribution from Grammy's recipe box. I inherited this recipe box as a young girl when my Grammy passed away from ovarian cancer. Over the years, I have cherished its contents. Some recipes date back to my Grammy's mother El and Grammy's aunt Esther in the 1910-20's. If you use a recipe or cooking tip from Grammy's recipe box, I'd love to hear about it.

To see more of Grammy's recipes, click on the "Grammy's recipe box" label at the end of this post.

In my continuing exploration in creating vintage recipe dimensional art shadowboxes, I decided today to make up an old recipe out my Grammy's recipe box. This is the first of many recipes I will be making in order to photograph the finished result and then illustrate it in watercolors for the art pieces.

I inherited my Grammy's recipe box at her passing when I was 10 years old. It's a lovely wooden box with her maiden name initials on the front (she didn't marry until her late 20's). The box is full of recipes that span from around 1910 through the 1970's. The older recipes, written in fountain pen, are yellowed with a wonderful aged patina. Some have splatters of batter on them. Some are missing corners or the ink is smudged. Some recipes are actually dated with the name of the person who introduced the recipe, and I was pleased to find a few that belonged to my great-grandmother and must have come from her recipe box.

Very few, if any, of the recipes are illustrated. And I think I've only witnessed a handful of them being made in my presence. Most of them are for foods that I've never seen or tasted. So this culinary and artistic journey proves to be quite an adventure... and today's experience was no exception.

I decided to start with the handwritten recipe for "Chocolate Creams". They seemed simple enough. But as I have discovered with many of the recipes in the box, the measurements on the ingredients are a bit vague--like exactly how much confectioners' sugar goes into the "cream" to make it a stiff paste. As Hubby pointed out, one was probably supposed to learn how to make it from watching someone else do it again and again. So I had to experiment a bit and tweak a little.

The results are these decadent candy delights that feel "sinful" to even have in the kitchen. Hubby did try some of the "oops" candies and deemed them officially "sinful" in every way that a chocolate-covered almond and vanilla flavored sugar-paste ball can be. Of course I had to taste as I mixed to get the flavoring just right. All the recipe said was "6 drops of flavoring" (see what I mean by vague). The tasting alone gave me a sugar buzz that I'm still feeling as I write this over an hour later.

But I have to admit that the many of the finished candies are promising subjects for the watercolor illustrations I'll be painting. I'll be sharing the finished art piece here as soon as I have it illustrated and constructed. In the meantime, if you want to see the other completed pieces that make up the debut collection of my vintage recipe dimensional art, just click here.

This is how the recipe is written (I did some tweaking that I'll note after):

Chocolate Creams
1 egg white
2 T cold water
Confectioners sugar (powdered sugar)
6 drops flavoring
1/4 lb. sweet chocolate

Beat the egg and water together only til mixed; add the sugar til the ingredients form a stiff paste (about 1-1 1/2 cups). Work in flavoring with sugar; then form into small balls. Grate the chocolate and put in a cup over hot water to melt. Dip the balls into it one at a time; using a fork for the dipping. Lay separately on waxed paper and, if necessary, dip a second time.

Now for my tweaks and tips:

It took more than 1 1/2 cups of powdered sugar to create a paste that could be rolled. I just kept adding until it was stiff enough then rolled the centers using powdered sugar to keep it from sticking.
I used almond extract AND vanilla as a flavoring and it took way more than just 6 drops to fit my taste.
I used semi-sweet chocolate chips but I think that next time I'll use an even darker chocolate since the centers are so sweet that the darker chocolate would work. It took more than only a 1/4 lb. to have a deep enough bowl of dipping chocolate. Once I had a deep enough reservoir the dipping was really easy with a fork, and it only took one dip to coat the centers nice and thick.
I suppose you could flavor the centers with about anything that you can think of. You could even color the center paste to make it different too.
These need to be kept refrigerated (especially in warmer weather). I had some little Wilton's treat bags that I packaged them in to give away to friends.

Sometimes You Just HAVE to Have Refried Beans and Cheese

2008-07-30T12:23:00.000-07:00

Hubby and I got done with our walk by the marina as the sun went down late at almost 9 p.m. last night.

As we got into the car I said, "Now I have a craving for refried beans and chips."

This happened the last time as well, and we drove all the way to Walnut Creek because La Primavera was closed.

This time, light dawned on marble head!

"Let's just stop at Cinco de Mayo!" I suggested enthusiatically.

Cinco de Mayo is right along the road we take to get home from the marina. And fortunately, they stay open a little later than La Primavera (HUGE plus for Cinco de Mayo).

So I got my beans with cheese and the wonderful homemade tortilla chips AND they were still wonderfully warm and delicious when we got home. Score one point (and a bonus point) for Cinco de Mayo!

Adventures in Fruit Leather

2008-07-25T15:30:00.000-07:00

After a failed attempt at making prunes over a week ago, it took a while for me to build up enough gumption to try and make fruit leather from what is left of the plum harvest from our tree this year.

Yesterday, I looked at the basket and two bowls of plums on the kitchen table and realized that if I didn't do something with them, they would go bad (I've had my fill of fresh plums this season).

So, as I approach many of my "projects", I had to dive right in while I still felt the nerve and drive to do it. I knew if I waited, that the mood would pass, and I'd still have the same basket and two bowls of plums as well as a nagging thought that I'd chickened out.

Following the instructions that came with our Nesco dehydrator, I pureed the pitted plums (skins and all) in the blender until smooth. I sweetened the mixture to taste with corn syrup (apparently granulated sugar will make it brittle). Then I poured the mixture on the one plastic tray for making fruit leather that came with the unit. I had quite a bit of mixture left over in the blender and didn't want to do only one trayful, so I used another tier of the dehydrator as a template and cut out a "tray" out of parchment paper (I was feeling adventurous).

The dehydration took a little longer than expected (probably because my mixture was poured out a little too deep), but the result is exactly what I wanted! Believe it or not, the parchment paper tray was done in far less time. I liked the result better too.

I've now successfully produced my favorite flavor of fruit leather--plum! Now I am much more confident with the process and plan on turning the rest of the plums into fruit leather as well.

And as an endnote... I thought of my friend Emiline over at Visions of Sugar Plum the entire time I did this as well as when I was taking the photos. So, Emiline, this plummy post is dedicated to you!

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Life's Little Pleasures From the Garden

2008-07-25T12:05:00.001-07:00

Yesterday evening, I ventured out into the garden before the sun went down to do "garden patrol". "Garden patrol" consists of watering things that aren't on the drip-mist irrigation system yet; checking on produce to see if it's ready for harvesting; check the water levels in the pond and other water feature; say hi to the garden kitties, Oreo and Mooch, and give them some canned food; and just check on the latest developments in the garden.

This time of year during my garden patrol, I often find produce that is at the peak of perfection and ready to be picked. Yesterday was no exception. I retrieved my wide and low harvest basket with a big handle to sling over my arm. I went in the back garden to harvest the luscious strawberries and plums as well as some pole beans and spinach leaves. It made for such a lovely arrangement in the basket that I had to photograph them before I dismantled it.

Once inside, the spinach and pole beans go into containers in the fridge with others that have been harvested over the past couple of days. With small harvests, this is the best way to get a good serving together.

The strawberries were rinsed and went straight into a cup to be delivered to Hubby who was working hard in his home office. I have been eating the strawberries straight off the bushes out in the garden for a month or so now. I thought it was only fair that he should get the next few batches.

The plums went into the fridge too so I could cool them off since they were quite warm after being out in the heat all day. Later in the evening I had cold juicy plums for dessert after our late dinner. Yum!

This is why I love gardening so much. These little treasures make it all worth it.

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The Intrigue of Artichokes in the Harvest Basket

2008-07-25T12:04:00.001-07:00

With records temperatures hovering at over 100 F (38 C), there isn't much I can do in the garden. The San Francisco Bay Area is under a health advisory because of the heat that is upon us. Even if I could stand working in the heat, it would be extremely unhealthy to do so right now.

I ventured out this afternoon despite the oppressive heat, to top off the pond with water so that all the critters that use it as a water source have a plentiful supply of cool water to drink. Since I had to wait for the water to finish, I decided to fill the harvest basket with this year's harvest of artichokes.

I don't know why I think artichokes are so visually intriguing. I wrote about them last summer in my post "The Beauty of Artichokes". With this year's harvest in my basket, I had to take the time to photograph them again and try to capture all the things that make them such a fascinating form to my artistic mind.

In the past, I have photographed the artichokes while still growing on their thick silvery blue-green stalks. I haven't ever harvested the artichokes all at once. Instead, I usually ask Hubby if he feels like having artichokes for dinner (he's the only one that likes them) and then I go out and harvest the biggest and nicest one or two. Usually, the artichokes are staggered in size because the start at different times and don't grow all at the same pace. But this year, they are all coming to their peak at the same time, coincidentally, right before we are going to see friends and family tomorrow that might also appreciate some artichokes.

That's why I had a full harvest basket of artichokes to photograph. And I'm so glad I did because I'm finding their forms even more intriguing en masse. I hope you all will agree. I think the way the light highlights and shadows the petals and layers of each artichoke is captivating. As I mentioned in my previous post about artichokes, who was the first person to discover that these odd looking blossoms were edible. That person must have been extremely hungry! To me, the artichoke looks more like a succulent cactus than a vegetable. But for artichoke lovers like my Hubby, they are a delicacy not to be missed.

Now the harvest is soaking in covered bowls of cold water in the kitchen sink. Since I'm an organic gardener, there are quite a few critters that hide in all those nooks and crannies of the intriguing artichokes--mostly earwigs and ants. After a good soak out of sight of Hubby (who gets a bit squeamish), this harvest will be ready to be steamed or given away to friends and family tomorrow. In the meantime, I can enjoy them in the way I love best--photographing them.

Juicy Plums for Independence Day

2008-07-25T12:02:00.000-07:00

A bountiful harvest has begun here at Rosehaven Cottage thanks to one Santa Rosa plum tree that is laden with so much fruit some of its boughs are bending and touching the ground. This is really exciting for me because this is the first year that the tree has actually produced more than 1 or 2 plums. I LOVE plums (Hubby doesn't like them) so I am thrilled!

Some of you may remember that I wrote about this plight earlier in the year when the tree was blossoming as I shared some photos of the lovely spring plum blossoms. Now the majority of those blossoms have become luscious plums that are ripening at varying rates all over the tree.

Because sitting under the plum tree is one of my favorite daily activities, I have been watching and gently hand-checking the fruit each time I'm out there. Early in the ripening stages when a plum that's been within my reach has been ripe enough, I've plucked it from the tree and eaten it right there. Yummy!

Well, now that the number of plums that are ripe has increased, I was able to take my harvest basket out and pick the first bunch of plums all at once. That was a real treat!

The plums came inside and went into this nifty rinsing basket that Hubby has in the kitchen (the kitchen is Hubby's domain, by the way). After a good rinse in some cool water, the plums were covered with droplets and were very photogenic (as you can see in the photos above).

Of course I've eaten the perfectly ripe ones as a wonderful sweet treat as part of my breakfast, lunch, or dinner. As the others ripen, I'm going to try my hand at making homemade fruit leather with our home dehydrator. I'll make sure and photographically document the process when I do so I can share.

Now why, you may ask, am I featuring these fresh fruits on America's Independence Day?

Well, today is also my own Independence Day. It was two years ago today that I made the life-changing decision to eat, eat well, and gain my independence from the burdens of a chronic illness as well as OCD-related anxiety and depression. Along with adopting the WeightWatchers lifestyle, I consciously chose to no longer consume any hydrogenated oils and products (trans fats) while increasing my consumption of Omega-3 fatty acids in the form of walnuts and other nuts. I also chose to eat instead of continuing the pattern of "forgetting" to eat all day--a pattern that was taking me down a very unhealthy road and had caused my metabolism to grind to a halt. July 4, 2006 was a very big milestone day for me, to say the least.

As I've traveled this interesting health-focused journey for the past 2 years, I've come to love simple and luscious foods like these plums that I'm harvesting off our tree. Grown organically (as all the other produce in our garden), these plums are more than a summer treat for me. Instead, I see each one as a small package of health and wellness ready for me to consume and gain its benefits--the most profound benefit being independence.

Happy Independence Day!

Links to my writing on the Rosehaven Cottage Health, Wellness, and Food blog:
A Delicious Way to Get My Veggies
"Cute Attacks" and Feeling Healthy
Managing Anxiety and Depression with Nutrition

Links to spiritually-based resources at Provident Living:
Helpful Information on Social and Emotional Strength
Physical Health

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Elephant Bar: Upscale Dining at Reasonable Prices

2008-04-08T22:36:00.001-07:00

When the Elephant Bar restaurant opened its doors in Concord, California at least 8 years ago, we were dubious about having yet another casual dining themed chain restaurant... so I avoided making even the slightest suggestion to my wife that we "test it out". We really should have given it a chance earlier. At our first dining experience at Elephant Bar, we were very pleased indeed; they served up exceptional meals at a very reasonable price.

The decor feels a bit like a Princess Cruises ship blended with the Jungle Cruise attraction at Disneyland, with undulating levels of semi-circular booth seating and theme-parkesque artificial rock fashioned into a freakishly large elephant head hanging from the back wall of the dining room. But it’s not overpowering, and the color choices are rich and pleasing. The restaurant was very clean, and it was refreshing to see an open kitchen in a casual dining environment.

The staff was very attentive, but not so much so as to make a nuisance of themselves. I was openly taking notes in a small steno pad which undoubtedly prompted a mid-meal tableside visit from one of the chefs (Cindy taking photographs with her conspicuous camera probably was a tip-off as well). At the end of our little chat with the chef, we identified ourselves as foodies, reviewers, and featured publishers for FoodBuzz. He later came back to our table with his business card, and happily informed us that he was about to open up another more upscale version of the Elephant Bar just down the road about 30 miles in Dublin, California.

This restaurant has the most varied menu of any casual dining restaurant I’ve ever encountered--from Pacific Rim Specialties like Bangkok Pad Thai with Vegetables & Tofu to American standards like their Classic Hamburger. Wow!

Our selections were easy. My wife had the Roasted French Dip with Swiss Sandwich (she had the chef had carmelized onions). I had the Crispy Teriyaki Chicken (off the Pacific Rim Specialties menu).

My wife reported that the French Dip featured a roll with a good crumb filled with tender, thinly sliced beef with just the right amount of caramelized onion and Swiss cheese. The au jus for dipping the sandwich wasn’t too salty (that can make or break a French Dip). She was also very pleased that the sandwich wasn't over-sized in its proportions. Often restaurants make the mistake of making a French Dip too large to bite or handle. This sandwich also had the right ratio of meat to bread (another deal breaker if done wrong).

I snuck some of her fries from the ample serving served to the side of the sandwich. I was very pleased that the fries weren’t at all greasy or overcooked, but light and fluffy with a crispy exterior. Good!

My Crispy Teriyaki Chicken was an ample portion, but I would have liked a bit more. The dinner was served with steamed rice and featured a mushroom soy-ginger sauce that I could have everyday of the week. I usually have to go to my local "mom & pop" Chinese restaurant for this level of wok cookery, but here it was at a chain… hmmm. I don’t quite know what to think about that, but I was pleased that I could get this type of meal here with my wife having one of her favorites and the two of us sitting at the same booth instead of in our living room with take-out from two different restaurants (trust me, it happens).

Overall, we enjoyed our dining experience at Elephant Bar and will plan another visit in the near future. They also offer take-out for when we just don’t have the time for the full dining experience, and I won’t have to drive to two separate establishments to get what we want!

Five Fun Food Facts Meme

2008-02-27T10:16:00.000-08:00

I was just tagged by Holly over at 2 Kids and Tired with this food meme.

First I'll post the rules, because they say I have to:
1. Link to your tagger and post these rules.
2. Share 5 food facts about yourself.
3. Tag 5 people at the end of your post and list their names (linking to them)
4. Let them know they've been tagged by leaving a comment at their blogs.

But since I'm feeling rebellious today, I'm picking and choosing which rules I am going to follow--kinda like a food menu (get it?). I'll take a number 1 and a number 2 but hold the number 3 and no number 4.

Five Fun Food Facts About Me

I love black olives (not green ones)

I've loved black olives for as long as I can remember. When I was a toddler, I would put an olive on each finger and call myself the "ollie monster".

I don't do that anymore (Hubby is so happy about that--particularly when we're at a party with olives in the veggie tray). I like my olives dipped in ranch dressing now.

I also like the taste of the "olive juice" in the can (I guess it's called "brine"). I love you, olive juice. Get it? Say it slowly if you don't.

I love tomato products but not fresh tomatoes

Give me a great tomato-based spagetti sauce anyday (even with chunks of tomato in it) but hold the tomatoes on my dinner salad.

I grow a lot of fresh tomatoes every summer, but they are all for Hubby who eats them like candy (particularly the Sweet 100's). I, however, don't like the taste of fresh tomatoes. It's the taste that's the same as the tomato plant smells that I really dislike. But if a bunch of fresh tomatoes have marinated long enough in a salsa then I love them.

Given the choice between a piece of chocolate or a piece of white cake, I'd choose the white cake

Although do have my daily dose of 1 oz. of semi-sweet chocolate a day as suggested by Dr. Cristiane Northrup for a happier Cindy (particularly in winter), I'm not a choc-aholic persay. If given the choice between chocolate and something else, I will almost always choose the "something else". I'm a lover of blonde desserts--plain cheesecake, white wedding cake, white angel food cake, vanilla ice cream... you get the picture. And given a choice between a chocolate dessert and a slice of good boysenberry, cherry, or apple pie? The slice of pie will win hands down! And if it's a cherry cheesecake? Well, there's no contest there! The cherry cheesecake will always get my vote.

My all-time favorite home-cooked meal is Porcupine Meatballs

No, they aren't made with porcupine meat! These meatballs are made with ground beef. My mom started making them from a recipe found in a Betty Crocker pamphlet she had. I've now inherited that pamphlet and dug it out the other night so Hubby could see the origin of my favorite meal (see the scan at right). After having spent the last 10 years reciting the recipe to Hubby from memory so he could make it (he's the cook in the house, not me), Hubby wanted to see the original recipe. And when he did, he was surprised at how much the recipe has been tweaked over the years by my mom and me. I think next time he makes them, he's going to make them exactly like the recipe to see how much of a difference there is between the original version and our tweaked version.

Regardless, porcupine meatballs taste great and make awesome leftovers that are easily microwaved. It's a recipe that indeed is a great way to stretch your budget. Here's the original recipe in case anyone else is willing to try out this great classic and make it a family favorite.

And finally... my last fun food fact!

I make great microwave food

For two years in high school, I worked at Burger King. I learned to make a mean Whopper in record time. I also developed an affinity for making microwave sandwiches and other foods. I really don't like cooking (which is why Hubby "owns" the kitchen at Rosehaven Cottage), but if I can make a microwaved sandwich or other entree, I'm happy. A favorite of mine is a re-creation of a menu item that was on the Burger King menu way back before I worked there. It was the Yumbo. It was basically a hot ham and cheese sandwich (just ham, cheese, and the bun) a lot like the one you can still get at Arby's.

I can make a Yumbo at home with a nice high-quality hamburger bun (whole wheat is the best), about 6-8 slices of good deli ham, and 2 slices of deli-quality American cheese. The meat has to be folded and stacked just right to catch all the juices and melted cheese after it's been microwaved for about 45 seconds on high. Man, is it a great sandwich but it's a little high in the cholesterol and fat department.

A healthier microwave meal option that I really love are my whole grain nachos (photo at right) that are only 6 WeightWatchers points for a whole big plateful.

Here's how to make them:

15 whole grain tortilla chips from Trader Joe's (Salsa Fresca flavor is great!)

1/2 can of fat-free refried beans 1 oz. sharp cheddar cheese

optional carmelized white vidalia onions (I use leftovers from other dishes)

Lay out the tortilla chips in one layer with edges slightly overlapping onto a microwave-safe plate. Put spoonfuls of refried beans evenly spaced over layer of chips. Hand-grate cheddar cheese over top. To regulate the amount, I put the entire plate onto my kitchen scale before putting the cheese on, zero out the weight, and then grate the cheese on until the scale reads 1 oz. Place optional onions over the top. Microwave the plate of nachos for 60-90 seconds on high. Enjoy with a cool glass of water!

Breakfast For Dinner

2008-02-10T23:17:00.000-08:00

The other evening, Hubby turned to me and said, "I feel like having breakfast for dinner. How would that be for a blog title?"

I thought it was a grand idea. At that point, we just needed to decide where it was that we were going to go to get breakfast for dinner at almost 9 o'clock at night. It had to be somewhere that we wanted to write about so it couldn't be a chain place that would be a snooze for our readers.

After going through some potential options, a light bulb went on in Hubby's head (I could see it in his eyes). "Let's go to Giant Chef [formerly Chef Burger] in Pleasant Hill! I used to go there years ago, and they have great breakfasts served all day and night!"

So it was off to Giant Chef we went.

Hubby ordered the Ham Breakfast ($6.95) that includes, ham, of course, 3 eggs any way you like them, hash browns and toast. It was delivered hot and made to order. This ham steak was probably the most tender ham he had ever had. The browns were crispy outside and fluffy inside, almost like shredded baked potato rather than the usual oily mass that other places tend to serve...how did they do it? The eggs were fresh and cooked to order - he likes them over medium with a dash or two of Tobasco Brand sauce. He ordered rye toast. They only had light rye, which was okay but he prefers dark rye. It was great toast nonetheless. He said that whenever we feel like breakfast for dinner we know exactly where we'll go.

I ordered the Ham Breakfast as well only I had my eggs scrambled and I had wheat toast. I also ordered a side of pancakes--the Short Stack. My goodness were those great pancakes! They smelled like the handmade waffle cones and had a taste that was kind of like vanilla except with another nuance I couldn't quite identify. The two pancakes in a Short Stack are huge! They measured about 7-8" in diameter. I only had half a piece of my toast so I would have room for the pancakes and even then I wasn't able to eat them all.

The service at Giant Chef is very personable with a down-home-small-town feeling. The establishment has been around since the 1940's, so it is a landmark in the community. We observed a number of California Highway Patrol officers and other local law enforcement coming in or going out. If it's popular with the cops than it's gotta be a pretty good place, right?

At the end of our meal, we unknowingly tried to pay with a credit card. Oops! Giant Chef only excepts cash! Remember, they ONLY ACCEPT CASH! We were both short on cash, so I sat in the booth while Hubby ran across the street to an ATM. It was either that or do some dishwashing in back.

The Original Mel's Diner: Home of American Graffiti

2008-02-04T18:52:00.001-08:00

A rainy evening a couple of days ago, Hubby and I realized later than usual that we hadn't eaten dinner yet. Hubby wasn't in the mood to cook anything and wanted us to just get out. So off to Walnut Creek we went to dine at Mel's Diner--a perfect late night eatery as it is open until 3 a.m.!

Mel's Diner is a classic 50's-style diner based on the drive-in featured in the early George Lucas film American Graffiti. The original eatery where the filming of the movie actually occurred was located in the Central Valley town of Modesto, California. Since that time, other Mel's Diner locations have opened around the West with most being company-owned. However, the Walnut Creek establishment is actually a franchise (which we just learned on this visit).

The decor is classic 50's diner decor with lots of American Graffiti memorabilia and photos gracing the walls. Even if you aren't a fan of the film, Mel's Diner is sure to be a treat because of its easy-going atmosphere, nostalgic charm, and great food. And the service has never been anything less than superb in all our visits even to other locations.

Hubby chose to order the Mel's Classic Burger. The burger was served hot and juicy--just right to curb the craving for the "perfect burger". The bun was very impressive. It held together being was more like a dinner roll than a bun in its density. A large pickle spear being served on the side was refreshing as pickle on the burger is sometimes overpowering. The large leaf of lettuce was fresh and crisp. The burger came without mayo--which made it a refreshing change as one doesn't always want the added calories (although there may have been some butter on the bun).

I ordered my favorite, the French Dip sandwich. The sandwich is offered as a traditional French Dip with roast beef only on the bun or for a nominal charge one can order it Philly style with bell peppers, onions, and cheese. I ordered mine with grilled onions and cheese. Of course the sandwich is served with a small bowl of au jus. Au jus can make or break a French Dip sandwich, and I found Mel's au jus to be very tasty but not too salty. The roast beef was succulent, tender, and perfectly sliced making bites into the sandwich easy.

Instead of the standard side of fries or cole slaw, we chose the beer-battered onion rings (that cost a little extra). The generous portions of rings were hot, crispy, and tasted wonderful. Hubby ate his without condiments while I chose to eat mine like I always do with lots of ketchup. And as really good onion rings should be, they were almost too big to eat in a polite manner. That's the way diner food should be in our estimation--not too fussy and a little bit messy.

The overall ambience of Mel's Diner is always enhanced by the music that plays in the background from the old jukebox that's been converted to play CD's. Many times during our meal, we would be sitting there and then realize that we were quietly humming along to a favorite old tune that we've heard so much throughout our lives that's it's just become a part of the fabric of who we are. I think that's why Mel's Diner appeals to us (and many others). It represents a slice of Americana that has actually been woven into the fabric of our lives. It is who we are. And reconnecting with that part of ourselves is always a great way to spend a rainy evening when it's late, we're hungry, and Hubby doesn't want to cook.

To see any one of the images in this review larger, just click on it. All photographs were taken by permission of the management of the Mel's Diner in Walnut Creek, California.

Daily Grill in downtown Portland, Oregon

2008-01-29T15:28:00.000-08:00

On a recent business trip to Portland, Oregon we had the opportunity to stay at the Westin in downtown Portland. Shortly after our morning flight arrival and check-in, we chose to dine at the first floor restaurant Daily Grill for lunch (located on the corner of Park and Alder at 750 SW Alder).

We expected from the name for the establishment for it to be more like a sports bar or pub than it actually was. We were pleasantly surprised by the upscale decor with dark burled woods and deeply colored walls contrasting with the white table linens. Giant empty wine and champagne bottles sat in arrangements on the dividers between booths and tables. Natural sunlight streamed in the windows that looked out onto a busy downtown Portland street. Even for the lunch service, the service staff was dressed formally in white shirts with black bow ties). Don't let the name of the establishment mislead you.

The menu had many enticing options all with a classic American flare. We chose to order the charbroiled skirt steak (a house specialty marinated in citrus juices, soy sauce and special seasonings) served with shoestring potatoes and steamed vegetables (broccoli was the vegetable in season). Freshly baked sourdough bread and butter was the only appetizer we needed for this succulent meal. Both of us agreed that it was the best skirt steak we have ever tasted (we would be hard-pressed to find a cut of meat of that caliber for a homecooked meal without quite a bit of hunting). Instead of overpowering the steak with a "Here I Am!" taste, the marinade perfectly complemented the savory red meat. The steak was so juicy there was no steak sauce required.

Despite the somewhat formal decor and dress of the servers, the atmosphere proved to be relaxed and not intimidating in the least. It was easy to sit and have a quiet private conversation and not feel rushed. This was exactly what we needed after having spent the morning traveling through airports.

The steak was definitely one of the pricier items on the menu at $17.95 a plate. Many other options would have brought the total tab of our lunch down considerably. But the skirt steak was wonderful (well worth the price), and the service was top-notch just as one would expect from a Westin restaurant.

Good Nuts versus Bad N.U.T.S.

2008-01-19T21:35:00.000-08:00

It turns out that nuts are not just for squirrels. I've been reading the book YOU: The Owner's Manual by Michael F. Roizen, M.D. and Mehmet C. Oz, M.D. and found some interesting facts about how nuts can be very good for one's state of mind and well-being, while N.U.T.'s can be detrimental to one's state of well-being and emotional equilibrium.

Good Nuts
It turns out that eating just 12 walnuts a day (or just 1 ounce of any other nut of choice) can not only help to raise your HDL cholesterol (that's the good kind) and help your arteries be clearer, but the same 12 walnuts a day can also boost your mood by providing your body with omega-3 fatty acids which can raise seratonin in your brain thus helping to reduce depression.

If you're not a fan of walnuts, then 24 almonds will also do the trick. Don't overdo it or the calories will become a problem. Just stick with the magic number of 12 (or 24).

Drs. Oz and Roizen say that by making that one simple change in one's daily diet a woman can make her RealAge™ 4.4 years younger while a man can make his 3.3 years younger.

Bad N.U.T.'s
While judicially consuming nuts everyday can make you healthier, Drs. Oz and Roizen say that there are some N.U.T.S. that you need to get rid of--Nagging Unfinished Tasks. N.U.T.'s are those annoying things that hang around in the back of your mind (the book cites the example of "the nagging stress of sitting on a wobbly toilet seat and never fixing it"). These N.U.T.'s are stressors that can be quite detrimental, even moreso than the stress of a flat tire or other little "emergencies" that arise in our day--Important But Manageable events or I.B.M.'s.

Even though your N.U.T.'s may not seem like a big deal to anyone else, if they're bugging you incessantly they can have a negative impact on your health and wellness. Repeated stress elevates the levels of the hormone cortisol in your body and that leads to stuff that isn't great for you in the long-run.

Making Chip and Dale Proud
Remember the old Disney cartoons with Chip and Dale and their tree full of nuts precariously packed in just ready to come pouring out if one little thing shifts? The information from Drs. Oz and Roizen brought that image into my mind when I thought of my own N.U.T.'s. I got to thinking... which N.U.T.'s do I "stockpile" in my life? Over the past couple of days, I've taken a really cold hard look at how many N.U.T.'s I've got crammed into every nook and cranny of my life and, therefore, my brain. My brain is just like Chip and Dale's tree! One little shift and all those N.U.T.'s come crashing down! Just like it wasn't good for Donald Duck, it isn't good for me either.

So instead of stockpiling N.U.T.'s, I've decided to focus on "piling up" my 12 little walnuts a day. I've started a little therapeutic daily ritual of taking my 12 walnuts out into the back garden so I can sit on my chaise lounge in a patch of sun while I crack them open. As I crack open each walnut I do so in a kind of meditative way thinking about the good it will do my body and my brain. Then I meditate and try to remove the bad N.U.T.'s from my life (most of which are there because I put them there) or at least re-prioritize them so they don't clutter up my mind. Gradually, I think I can finally tackle the bad N.U.T.'s as I take in the good nuts.

Perfect beans and rice for New Year's

2008-01-05T21:00:00.000-08:00

After a walk around the Martinez Marina to enjoy chilly but sunny New Year's Day weather, we decided to treat ourselves to an early dinner at La Primavera Mexican restaurant located at 1311 Pine Street in downtown Martinez, California.

Hubby had eaten their refried beans and rice and said they were the best he's ever tasted aside from those we found at Cholo's in Haleiwa on the north shore of O'ahu. Since we're always on a quest for the perfect beans and rice, I was anxious to taste them as well as the rest of the fare.

We were pleased to find La Primavera open on the holiday. Hubby's impression upon entering La Primavera was, "This is the cleanest restaurant!" And it is! It's a real joy (and relief) to enter a small "mom and pop" establishment and have that be one's first impression.

We were also charmed by the atmosphere of casual Mexican dining that was enhanced by brightly colored wall and ceiling murals; vintage style boothes and counter stools in red green and yellow vinyl; and the traditional Mexican music playing over the stereo system. It felt like we had stepped off Pine Street into Mexico.

We were greeted and seated promptly and cordially by the waitress that would then be our server for the evening. She brought us chips with two kinds of salsa: mild and not-so-mild (a real nice kick with a good smokey edge). The chips were obviously made on-site and were very fresh.

After perusing an extensive, but not overwhelming, menu we chose carne asada for our New Year's meal (the prices are very reasonable even for the steak). We were pleased to see that the menu includes some regional Mexican selections for those that want a taste of Mexico. The menu also includes an extensive breakfast menu with a Mexican flare.

Our meal was wonderful. The carne asada was seasoned to perfection. Hubby was right about the beans and rice. The flour and corn tortillas were fresh as can be served in a charming hand-embroidered and carefully pressed and starched cotton cloth with handmade lace edging as if we were sitting down to eat in a relative's kitchen. We could see the tortilla press behind the pristine counter where they had been made. It was all so impressive.

To add to the wonderful ambience, a gentleman (probably the owner or manager) sat at one of the counter stools rocking his baby girl. Once she was asleep, he placed her in her baby carrier with a pink blanket over it to shield her eyes from the light, and then proceeded to check on us and the other diners periodically, even bussing our plates. He continued to check on her and then the diners throughout our meal. That's impressive! It showed a commitment to the restaurant that one doesn't find in chain restaurants. It also added a quality that is hard to put into words.

We went away having dined sufficiently on superb Mexican food. I went away with a not only a wonderful memory of delicious food, but a wonderful memory of a dining experience. Will we go back? Most definitely! And we've probably started a New Year's tradition that we will continue to keep from this year on. Thank you La Primavera!

The Gift of Wellness for Christmas!

2007-12-27T20:26:00.000-08:00

I'm so excited that I can hardly stand it! Hubby surprised me by playing Santa this Christmas and presented me and himself each with a certificate for New Balance hiking boots! YAY!!!!!

So the day after Christmas (Boxing Day) we went out and purchased our new boots. We have happy feet right now! I can't say enough good things these New Balance boots/shoes. The fit and comfort is amazing (no, I'm not getting paid for the endorsement).

Now, you may ask, "Why are you so excited about hiking shoes????"

To answer that question, I will quote the certificate I received:

"This certificate is good for 1 (one) pair of comfortable
hiking shoes to be purchased after Christmas. Why? To get in condition for our
hikes in 2008."

We're going to be doing a lot of outdoor walks and hikes over the next 7-8 months to train for a hike that we want to do at Lassen Volcanic National Park next summer. I'm so happy! You have NO idea! Not only will I get to go hiking with my camera in tow, but I will be accompanied by my best friend and the love of my life. It is a Christmas dream come true.

Is This Frozen Yogurt Really Nonfat....mmmm?

2007-12-23T17:18:00.001-08:00

If you have a soft serve ice cream / yogurt maker like the Cuisinart Soft Serve Ice Cream Maker and you prefer a smooth, sweet, "ice creamy" style frozen yogurt, you can't go wrong with the Colombo line of frozen yogurt mixes, like their Royal Raspberry Nonfat frozen yogurt mix. The taste is subtle raspberry and not tart in the least - more like a fine vanilla soft serve yogurt, rich and not too sweet.

When we purchased the Cuisinart in the summer we tried a sampling of recipes that came with the machine, but non have come remotely close to the Colombo mix that we purchased. Preparation couldn't be easier...none of that pesky measuring or pre-mixing, all you have to do is defrost the mix for 36-72 hours in the fridge before use, shake well and pour into your yogurt maker and then wait while your machine does the churning and freezing, then dispense and enjoy.

I know what you must be thinking because I thought the same thing...you know, about it being December and not really a month when us here in North America crave the chilly attributes of frozen yogurt, but even though it's 52 outside it's 72 inside and why not enjoy a bit of summer in the first few days of winter?

But you deserve fair warning: Colombo yogurt mix isn't found in your grocery freezer case, nor is it found in your big box warehouse store. You'll have to order it from your local restaurant supply outlet, probably with a 1 case minimum. The case we purchased has 6-1/2 gallons containers and comes frozen. If stored frozen, they are good for 12 months, but I don't think they'll last that long around here.

Here's the skinny:
Serving size: 1/2 cup (prepared)
calories: 100
fat: 0 g (zero, zilch, nada, naught)
fiber: 0 g
sugars: 18 g
protein: 4 g
calcium: 10% DV
cholesterol: <5 mg

Fantasy Fudge for the Holidays

2007-12-19T12:00:00.001-08:00

There are just a few things that say "Christmas" to me. I think this is the case with most people. Those things can be varied and obscure, but are often rooted in tradition, nostalgia, and fond memories. Over the next few days, I'm going to attempt to write about a few of the things that make Christmas truly Christmas-y for me simply because of the nostalgia with which they are imbued in my mind.

Ever since I can remember, there were two things that my mom made especially for Christmas--homemade fudge and English toffee. The whole process of making candy absolutely fascinated me through my childhood. When I was old enough, maybe 8 years old, Mom let me help out instead of just watch. I was usually responsible for stirring because keeping the sugar and butter mixture stirring constantly was critical as it heated to the temperature desired for either soft ball (fudge) or hard crack (toffee).

Mom's fudge recipe is no secret. It's the recipe that Kraft has been printing on its jars of Jet-Puffed Marshmallow Creme (an essential ingredient in fudge) for eons . The recipe is "officially" called "Fantasy Fudge". I didn't know that until I was an adult. All I knew was that Mom's fudge was the best! There wasn't any other kind of fudge from any fancy candy shop that could rival it and still have yet to find one. And the funny thing is that it's a Kraft recipe!

Now, even though I am very health-conscious and a big proponent of nutritious and healthy eating I must say that there are some foods that fall into a "special" category reserved for nostalgic "comfort foods" that are made as part of a family tradition. Those foods should be celebrated. I can account for the calories somehow, but darned if I'm going to feel guilty for carrying on a family tradition that makes Christmas feel right to me.

So without further adieu, here is the recipe straight off the Jet-Puffed Marshmallow Creme jar sitting here on my desk:

Fantasy Fudge
3 cups sugar
3/4 cup (1 1/2 sticks butter or margarine--go with the butter)
1 small can (5 oz.) evaporated milk (about 2/3 cup)
1 1/2 pkg. (12 squares) Baker's Semi-Sweet Baking Chocolate, chopped
1 jar (7 oz.) Jet-Puffed Marshmallow Creme
1 cup chopped walnuts (or leave them out if you have an allergy like Hubby does)
1 tsp. vanilla

Line 9-inch square pan with foil, with ends of foil extending over sides of pan; set aside. Place sugar, butter and evaporated milke in large heavy saucepan. Bring to full rolling boil on medium heat, stirring constantly. Boil 4 min. or until candy thermometer reaches 234ºF (soft ball), stirring constantly to prevent scorching. Remove from heat.

Add chocolate and marshmallow creme, stir until completely melted. Add walnuts (if desired) and vanilla; mix well.

Pour immediately into prepared pan; spread to form even layer in pan. Let stand at room temperature 4 hours or until completely cooled; cut into 1-inch squares. Store in tightly covered container at room temperature. Makes 3 lb. or 40 servings, about two squares each.

Variation - Classic Fantasy Fudge (the way Mom always made it)
Prepare recipe as directed, using 3/4 cup (1-1/2 sticks) margarine and substituting 1 pkg. (12 oz.) semi-sweet chocolate chips for the chopped BAKER'S Semi-Sweet Baking Chocolate and a 13x9-inch baking pan for the 9-inch square pan.

Nutritional Information (per serving)
Calories 170
Total fat 8 g
Saturated fat 4 g
Cholesterol 10 mg
Sodium 45 mg
Carbohydrate 25 g
Dietary fiber 1 g
Sugars 23 g
Protein 1 g
Vitamin A 2 %DV
Vitamin C 0 %DV
Calcium 0 %DV
Iron 2 %DV

All photographs featured here can be made available as unframed or framed prints, high-quality posters,
bound journals, tile coasters, keepsake boxes, greeting cards or a variety of other products.
Please email Cindy at rosehaven_cottage@yahoo.com for customization information.
Don't hesitate to ask about a special request.
Check out our online store to see the variety of products available and pricing.

A Free Way to Track Nutrition Online That Isn't Just a Diet

2007-12-07T12:09:00.001-08:00

For a year and a half now, I've been searching for an efficient and economical way to track nutrition (not just calories) in electronic form. Aside from building my own cumbersome and stand-alone spreadsheet in Excel, I wasn't finding anything to my liking. As a member of WeightWatchers for that year and a half, I utilized their proprietary tool but it only tracked WeightWatchers points and cost me a pretty penny. What to do? What to do?

The answer came in a humble little unobstrusive email from my MyPoints service that lets me earn points for clicking on buttons in emails they generate for advertisers. One such email came through for SparkPeople.com that touted it was a free service to help people track nutrition, go on a diet, and/or adopt a healthier lifestyle.

Free Calorie Counter at SparkPeople.com

It all sounded too good to be true. Boy, was I wrong!

SparkPeople is part of the new phenomenon of "Web 2.0" which includes websites that are free for the user and rely on other income (i.e., advertising) to pay the bills. The other aspect of SparkPeople that makes it "Web 2.0" is that it is interactive with its sophisticated tracking tools, grows as its users provide nutritional information to their amazingly comprehensive nutrition databse, and essentially offers an online community for health-conscious individuals. Technology is an amazing thing when visionary developers take it and create something as wonderful as SparkPeople.

SparkPeople lets me do all of the following (for FREE):

track my nutrition (not just calories but EVERYTHING)
track my daily water intake
set nutritional goals for myself
track my fitness activities
set fitness goals for myself
read valuable health related articles
view valuable health related videos (I recently watched one about the common cold that was very helpful while I was battling one)
join communities of individuals (called SparkTeams) that have similar interests and needs as I do
get emails including recipes, health articles, tips, etc.

That's just scratching the surface! I highly recommend going over there and trying it out (I'm even providing a button below). And don't let the word "diet" deter you--it's so much more than that!

NOTE: Neither the writer of Rosehaven Cottage is receiving NO COMPENSATION for writing this or for any reader utilizing the link button provided.

We have a wonderful new distinction!

2007-12-05T17:56:00.000-08:00

We are so pleased to announce that Rosehaven Cottage has been invited to be a Featured Publisher on foodbuzz--an online community for foodies!

Of course we graciously accepted the invitation and can finally make the announcement now that everything has been finalized.

We are so excited to be a part of this new foodie community and hope that many of our regular readers will take the opportunity to "buzz" on over to FoodBuzz and check it out!

Making Low-Fat Frozen Yogurt at Home

2007-10-05T21:40:00.001-07:00

My one birthday wish this year was to get a Cuisinart Soft Serve Ice Cream Maker that makes frozen desserts, because I'm always craving raspberry and boysenberry non-fat frozen yogurt and don't have somewhere I can get it locally. Thanks to my wonderful Hubby (who smartly used one of our 20% off coupons from Bed, Bath & Beyond), I got my birthday wish. After familiarizing myself with the instructional booklet and removing it from it many layers of styrofoam packing, the Cuisinart took its maiden voyage in making a raspberry non-fat frozen yogurt based on one of the recipes included in the instructional booklet. We photographed the process in order to share here in case anyone is curious how the process works and what the process looks like. I apologize in advance if any photos cause salivation, drooling, or cravings of any kind.

In addition to the Cuisinart, it was necessary to employ our Osterizer blender. If we hadn't been making a fruit recipe needing pureed fruit, the blender wouldn't have been a necessary piece of equipment for the process.

We chose to use fresh raspberries (although pricey) but we could have used thawed frozen fruit instead. Later on when the berries are no longer in season, I'll use frozen fruit.

The 12 oz. of raspberries went right into the blender. We also needed enough fresh limes to extract 1/4 cup of fresh lime juice (we used our electric juicer but a basic reamer will do just fine). The lime juice went into the blender as well.

We then added 3/4 cup of granulated sugar to the blender. Next time, I think I will experiment with a sugar substitute appropriate for baking purposes in order to keep the calories down.

Then it was time to puree everything in the blender until it was nice and smooth. I chose to strain out the seeds before continuing on with the rest of the mixing process, but it wasn't necessary. I just don't like seeds all that much. I still ended up with a few (which was fine).

After putting the puree in a medium bowl, we added 1 1/3 cups non-fat vanilla yogurt. Next time I'm going to go with just a plain yogurt instead a vanilla flavored one and add a dash of vanilla extract to punch up the flavor.

Then it was time to add 1/2 cup of whole milk. I think the whole milk is necessary for the added creaminess it gives. Calorie-wise it isn't much higher than 2% milk, but I suppose one could experiment with the lower fat milk if one wanted to lower the calories.

Once the dairy products were added, it was time to whisk to the entire mixture until satiny smooth (which doesn't take much time at all). Once the whisking is done, the instructional booklet said we could refrigerate the entire mixture until we were ready to use it. This was cool, because I did this before dinner, refrigerated the mixture, and then when we were ready for dessert all I had to do was turn on the machine and pour it in! Refrigerating the mixture beforehand, although not necessary, reduces the total time it takes for the soft serve ice cream to be ready to eat.

So once dinner was done, the machine got turned on and we poured the mixture into the easy-access window on the top of the unit. It was fun to stand and watch it mix and thicken up as it froze. Well, at least it was for me. Hubby didn't want to stand and watch it, so he went off to watch some television. In all the freezing process, takes about 20 minutes (a little less if the mixture was refrigerated first).

We tested the ice cream with little spoonfuls to make sure it was the right consistency before we dispensed it into vintage ice cream cups that I inherited from my great grandmother. It was fun dispensing it. Hubby says I'm more artful about it than he is (which is why I'm the one that makes our self-serve ice cream cones at Sweet Tomatoes).

The Good Verdict
Each little cup held about 1/3 cup of frozen yogurt which was a perfect portion of this delicious and rather rich dessert. It tasted way too decadent for a low-fat frozen yogurt, but it was! The TOTAL batch of 10 servings had 1,012 calories with 4 g of fat. So the final calorie is:

101.2 calories in one serving (pictured above)
.4g total fat in one serving

The Not-So-Good Verdict
The consistency, richness, and taste of the finished product was more like a sorbet or sherbet than I had expected and less like a creamy frozen yogurt. That was a bit disappointing when I had my heart set on a mild creamy frozen yogurt. It had an acidic tang to it that was definitely from the lime juice. I think adding less lime juice would have been better. The ratio of berries to yogurt seems off for a true yogurt so the next time I make I'm going to play with the ratio a bit and try to get the creamier and milder yogurt I was hoping.

A Delicious and Healthy Way to Get My Veggies

2007-08-04T20:00:00.000-07:00

WeightWatchers: 10 points

I admit right here and now that I am not a vegetable lover. My husband is, and I envy him. I wish my palate liked the taste of steamed vegetables, but it doesn't--I gag or wretch or any of those other unpleasant things. I just can't enjoy them at all. So I (and my "personal chef" husband) have to get creative on how I get my vegetables into my daily diet for good nutrition.

I had a brainstorm last night that I consider real inspiration from above. Here's the basic idea... I love pasta. I love marinara meat sauces. I also love vegetables in marinara meat sauces. So my idea was for him to chop up zucchini, mushrooms, and onions to be incorporated into a meat sauce that would be put over whole wheat pasta. I figured that I would get my complex carbs, my protein, AND my veggies all in one delicious shot.

I presented the idea to my husband and he concurred that it sounded like a great idea. So this evening after my husband made his weekly trip to the market, we embarked on the adventure of seeing if my idea was as great as it sounded. It was!

We are big fans of Trader Joe's (I apologize profusely to any readers that are not fortunate enough to have one in your area). Their foods are free of hydrogenated fats, tend to be organic, and are usually low in calories and fat (some are great for fiber). So my husband procurred the Trader Joe's marinara sauce to be used as the base for the sauce with canned tomato sauce to be added later to reduce the richness of the marinara. He also procurred nice fresh veggies from Trader Joe's. The whole wheat pasta came from Trader Joe's as well. The only ingredient that didn't was the 91% extra lean ground beef from Sam's Club.

After dicing up all the vegetables, my husband sauted them in about a tablespoon of olive oil (good stuff) and then added 4 oz. of extra lean ground beef. The ground beef and vegetables sauted together infuses the meat with the juices and flavors of the veggies (particularly the yummy onions). He then added the jar of marinara sauce and a can of tomato sauce and reduced the heat to let everything simmer and get super-yummy.

The pasta went on to boil at that point. When the pasta was nice and aldente, he drained it and divided the portions on the plates. The sauce was done simmering by that time so he ladelled the sauce over the top pasta on the serving plates and Voile! Although the portions were quite generous the total WeightWatchers points for the whole plate were only 10 points!

What did it taste like, you ask? The whole wheat pasta has a wonderful hearty and nutty flavor that I don't get when I eat just regular pasta. I love pasta aldente and the whole wheat pasta gave it a wonderful feel in my mouth. The sauce was rich but not too dark in flavor. It had a brightness that only fresh veggies can give a sauce without the pieces of veggies being slimy or surprising my mouth with punches of veggie flavors that I don't like. The flavors all married so beautifully. The ground beef was fresh and flavorful after having been sauted with the vegetables. It was a very filling meal that hit the spot and keep my tummy full for hours.

And the best part? There's leftover sauce for lunches this next week! All I have to do is boil the pasta!

"Cute Attacks" and Feeling Healthy

2007-08-01T12:38:00.000-07:00

Recently, I was listening to Dr. Christiane Northrup on a PBS special where she was talking about a way to create positive chemical and hormonal reactions inside one's body to encourage health. She said that the easiest way for a woman to do it is to think of something that makes her inner nurturing core glow.

Dr. Northrup gave examples. For some it is the thought of a newborn baby. For others it is the thought of baby birds or puppies. For some (like me) it is the thought of baby kittens. It's the "ahhhhh" response (or "cute attack" as we call it in our home) that gets all those good juices firing off inside us and creating health and wellness.

In other words, it's an antedote for all the stress responses that we are barraged with daily.

I've been trying to consciously practice this more often. I don't have a very hard time with my husband around. Every time a cute kitty pops on a cat food commerical, he pauses the DVR and runs it back so we can watch it (sometimes in slow motion). "Ahhhhhh!" we both say over and over. Now that I know it's actually good for me, it just makes it easier to give myself permission to engage in this somewhat silly but fulfilling behavior.

Well, besides baby kittens and fluffy felines on cat food commercials, one of the things that spawns a "cute attack" for me is the sight of a kitty cat lazing in a patch of sunshine. It doesn't have to be one of our own, either. We can be driving through town, and I'll want to slow down when I spot a kitty lounging on a porch or front walk. It's just something I do.

In our own home, I've encountered the sight a lot over the past couple of days (probably because of the sunny summer days we've had of late). Sometimes I've found them in the Tiki Room (named as such because of the vintage Hawaiian decor of this western facing sunroom we have). Other times I've found one of them lolling out the diamond-shaped openings in the Casa Grande cat condo into the rays of sunshine that spill in the windows of my studio. Then other times, I've found them spread out around me early in the morning on our bed that catches the first ray's of the day's dawn.

So today I felt like sharing some of my "cute attacks" that I've photographed. Enjoy and be healthy!

Managing Depression and Anxiety With Nutrition

2007-07-19T15:16:00.000-07:00

I'm a research junkie. I admit it. I own it. I'm okay with it.

I'm okay with it because it is the reason why I have found wonderful answers to my personal health issues. As I've taken the facts I've gleaned from various sources and put them all together into one whole just for me, I've found a great deal of relief from the maladies that biology has left me to face.

One such issue is my struggle with anxiety and depression combined. It seems to run in our family because as I've compared notes with relatives, we all manifest our issues in similar ways, and our genetic predecessors did as well for at least two generations back. The genetic cards I've been dealt haven't been an easy hand to play during life. But the bottomline seems to be a lack of seratonin in my system.

What is Seratonin?
Seratonin is the wonderful chemical that the brain uses to make electrical connections between brain cells so they can talk to one another. The seratonin serves like "wires"or "electrical conduits" for the electrical impulses to travel on. Called a neurotransmitter, seratonin is used to regulate lots of stuff in the body. It helps your brain to tell your heart to beat, to remind you to breathe, to tell your stomach and intestines to digest food. It's also used to regulate your mood.

The Limbic Center
About the size of a walnut, the limbic center of the brain is right in the core of the brain and is where all the "warm-fuzzies" get processed. It's where emotional attachments are processed. Women have a slightly bigger limbic than men which accounts for their ability to bond and for that in-born "mothering instinct". The limbic is where mood is handled and processed. Brain scans (pioneered by Dr. Daniel Amen) have shown that someone in a sad or depressed mood has a limbic that looks bright and "lit up" on a brain-activity scan, while someone that is in a fairly good mood has a limbic that doesn't light up nearly as much. The "hotter" the limbic runs the worse the person's mood usually is at the time of the scan. Just like a car radiator, the limbic can't run hot all the time without having adverse effects on every other function around it and connected to it. Just as a car radiator that overheats for too long eventually will result in a warped engine head, so too a limbic that overheats too long and too often will result in a "warped head".

Shortage of Seratonin
My body has a shortage of seratonin on a regular basis. For whatever reason, my body doesn't produce enough. Because my brain has a shortage of it, it uses the seratonin it does have for the critical functions first (i.e., keeping my heart beating). It then parses out the rest to other functions putting mood-regulation lowest on the priority list. So my brain has a tendency to run "hot" all the time because there's a lack of the "coolant" seratonin.

Getting More Seratonin into My Brain
The body is just amazing! It can take a complex carbohydrate food like whole wheat bread and in only a few digestive steps convert it into seratonin! Amazing! So for me, if I'm having an issue with anxiety I can eat a piece of whole wheat bread, a few Triscuits, or a yummy plate of whole grain nachos (pictured at right--see recipe at bottom). In about 20-30 minutes my mood feels more calm. If I remember to consume complex carbs throughout my day at regular intervals, I am able to regulate my anxiety much better. Conversely, if I eat a low-carb diet, I'm a bear to live with!

Nutritional "Supplements"
The work of both Dr. Christiane Northrup and Dr. Daniel Amen have been key for me to manage my seratonin imbalance issues as well. I take a multi-vitamin daily as well as a the following additional "supplements":

Vitamin C

Magnesium

Omega-3

Folic Acid

Vitamin D

30 min. daily of natural sunlight or light from a full-spectrum light bulb

Consciously and frequently think about something that makes my insides say "ahhhh" like baby kittens

Sing to myself and let myself dance

Give myself permission to take a nap when I need to nap

I don't consume foods that have anything "hydrogenated" in the ingredient list

I won't go into the reasons why all the above "supplements" are biologically necessary, but they all assist important functions in my body to help me feel better emotionally (and physically).

Medicinal Supplementation
I have a fairly severe issue with seratonin imbalance, so I also take a prescription medication that falls into the class of seratonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs). This class of meds works like a dam in a river. It prevents my body from reabsorbing the little seratonin that it does produce and creates a reservoir for my body to utilize for the lower priority functions that it would otherwise short-change if I didn't take the SSRI. There are number of SSRIs in this class of medications. I've been on 3 different ones over the past 12+ years. Each has it's benefits. Eventually, I found the right fit for my particular brain chemistry which allows me to take a small dose and still get all the benefits of the additional seratonin available to my brain.

Bottomline
For me, tackling anxiety and depression required a multi-faceted approach--counseling, medication, and nutrition. Nutrition is a major facet of the three. It is easy to slack off on nutrition, but if I do I feel it. I've found that if I "feed" my body and my brain with the right nutrition (including exposure to sunlight), my issues are very manageable and my life is much more fulfilling and rewarding.

"Salad" Doesn't Always Mean "Healthy"

2007-07-18T22:59:00.000-07:00

My husband and I went out for a movie earlier this week and decided to catch a late dinner afterward at Mimi's across the parking lot from the theatre. I always like their chicken caesar salad and figured it was a safe bet for me being on WeightWatchers.

It wasn't.

I didn't find out the painful truth until I got home from the restaurant with my tummy full of the "evil" salad and looked up the nutritional facts online. Here's the scary breakdown thanks to CalorieLab:

Mimi's Cafe Blackened Chicken Caesar Salad
1,524 calories
119g of fat
40.5 points

HUGE gulp... Panic, panic, panic... Lots of "I wish I had just come home" thoughts... Then the reality that I have to suck it up, record it, start over the next day, and MOVE ON!

The lesson learned in all of this? Well, there are a couple really:

1) Don't Assume - I'd eaten at Mimi's before and had the same menu item, but I had "guessimated" when I recorded my points in the past. I shouldn't have done that. I should have looked it up the first time, figured out that it was an unwise menu choice, and found a better option when I eat at that restaurant.

2) Get Over It - Once I'd made the unwise menu choice, I had to battle with my internal voices telling me all was lost for the week because I'd gone over for the day and for the week, and I might as well just go and eat everything else unwise in huge quantities too. That's probably a common response. But I realized I couldn't do that. Just because I consumed an unwise meal, doesn't mean I have to consume two or three or SIX! It just meant I consumed ONE! And I could start over again the next day with a clean slate and move on. The one unwise meal would probably affect my body's ability to handle the calories appropriately but tacking on a whole bunch more would make the situation even worse.

3) I Am Not a Failure - Just because I consumed the one unwise meal, doesn't discount the weight loss I've experienced over the past year nor does it cancel out all the good nutritious practices I've adhered to during that time and the health benefits I've had from it. Trust me, my mind still wanted to go to that place, but I've had to fight that tendency and force myself again and again to view it all with a broader and more healthy perspective.

Bottomline
Mimi's Cafe is not a bad restaurant by any means. But for someone like me, their Blackened Chicken Caesar Salad is not a good choice unless I have the calories/points to handle the consumption (and I'm not sure how I ever would). The calories and grams of fat in the serving given are awfully high for a salad.

A Harvest of Love

2007-07-12T18:07:00.001-07:00

There is very little else that can give me as much satisfaction as picking a basket of tomatoes straight out of the garden and bringing it inside to surprise my husband like I did today.

He's the tomato lover in the family and can eat them and eat them and eat them. He's the chef in the family so he makes wonderful culinary creations with them. He's also the allergy-sufferer in the family so he isn't able to be outside in our garden nearly as much as he'd like. It also means that he isn't aware of how many tomatoes are actually growing out there--hence the ability for me to surprise him with a brimming basket left on the kitchen counter in his prep area. It's always fun to hear him from the other room, "Oh Honey! Look at these tomatoes!" I know that he'll usually be making up one of his tomato salads with homemade vinaigrette later that evening

This whole ritual of growing tomatoes for my husband started the first spring we lived at Rosehaven Cottage.

We were immersed in remodeling and restoration--drowning in it actually. Our goal was to simply have access to all the square footage in our home, have a decent bathroom and kitchen, and not freeze from the drafts coming in from the spaces in the subfloor.

Early spring rolled around, and I had this overwhelming need to put in a vegetable garden. I was told by many that I was nuts and should just focus on the interior of the house. "Let the garden go this spring," they'd say helpfully, "Don't try to do everything at once."

But the persistent nagging to put in a garden kept coming into my psyche. I know not to ignor these persistent nagging thoughts. So I moved the installation of a vegetable garden up on the priority list (much to the disbelief of family and friends) and put in the first vegetable plants (including tomatoes) as soon as it was safe.

Summer came quickly and the tomatoes were thriving. I had put in Sweet 100's and the vines were burgeoning with the little round red gems of tomato sweetness.
At the same time that the tomatoes were ripening, my husband was struggling with health issues that led him to the doctor's office. On a hunch, the intuitive physician tested my husband's blood sugar right there in the office. It was through the roof. My husband walked out of the doctor's office that day with the diagnosis of being a Type 2 diabetic weighing on him. It would change his life. It explained a great deal of the health struggles he had experienced over the previous 2 years but wasn't any easier to take.

His mother is also a Type 2 diabetic and, fortunately, he had educated himself when she was diagnosed. He knew his diet would have to change drastically. His sweet tooth would have to be satisfied in some other way than the chocolate he was so fond of. But there is one thing that my husband loves more than chocolate--tomatoes!

It was now so clear why I had felt so driven to plant the vegetable garden. That first crop of Sweet 100's was a ray of hope during a very difficult life transition for him. The sweet little "candies" that he could pop in his mouth without guilt or hesitation made the depressing prospect of having diabetes so much easier to cope with. I knew that I had grown them for a very special reason, and it was no fluke that I had known to plant them.

So every year since that first year at Rosehaven Cottage, the tomatoe plants always go in the garden as soon as it's safe. My husband anxiously awaits the first tomato that is ripe enough to harvest. He's very much like a child waiting for Christmas morning. It's wonderful to watch. And every time I harvest another basketful and leave them on the kitchen counter for him, I feel a deep sense of love for him, for the garden, and for the blessing that tomatoes represent to us.

What Is Endometriosis?

2007-07-12T10:52:00.001-07:00

From the Endometriosis Research Center:

Over 5.5 million women in the United States alone suffer from a painful, chronic gynecological disease known as endometriosis. Affecting more women than breast cancer, endometriosis is a leading cause of female infertility and hysterectomy. The disease can have a debilitating impact on a woman's life and her relationships; in some cases rendering her unable to work, care for herself or her family, or go about her normal routine. Studies have even shown an elevated risk of certain cancers and autoimmune diseases in endometriosis patients. Currently, there is no definitive cure for endometriosis.

The Missed Disease

The average delay in diagnosis of the disease is a staggering 9 years. The disease is often confused for Pelvic Inflammatory Disease, bladder infections, Irritable Bowel Syndrome and a multitude of other conditions. It is important for patients and physicians to work closely together to detect, treat and effectively manage endometriosis at the onset of symptoms.

What is Endometriosis?

Endometriosis is a disease in which the endometrium (the tissue that lines the inside of the uterus which builds up and is shed each month during menstruation) is found outside the uterus, in other areas of the body. These implants still respond to hormonal commands each month, and break down and bleed. However, unlike the lining of the uterus, the tissue has no way of leaving the body. The result is internal bleeding, degeneration of blood and tissue shed from the growths, inflammation of the surrounding areas, and formation of scar tissue. Endometriosis lesions can present themselves in almost any color, shape, size and location. The lesions can be virtually any color including black, red, white, clear and more, and they can be microscopic in size. Endometriosis implants can be spread throughout the entire pelvis including the reproductive organs, bowels, bladder, diaphragm and other areas in the body, and may not be visible without proper magnifying equipment and thorough examination. While uncommon, endometriosis has even been found lodged in the skin and the brain.

Symptoms of Endometriosis

Symptoms include, but are not limited to:

heavy bleeding and pain before, during or after menstruation (pain is not normal!)
nausea
constipation
diarrhea
pain with intercourse
ectopic pregnancies
miscarriages
infertility
backache
bladder pain
premenstrual spotting

How is it Diagnosed?

Endometriosis may be suspected based on your symptoms. However, the disease can only be definitively diagnosed via surgery; either a "keyhole surgery" known as laparoscopy ("lap") or the more invasive laparotomy.

How is it Treated?

Studies have shown the most effective treatment for the disease is thorough eradication of all endometriosis. Unfortunately, if all the disease is not removed, there is an extremely high rate of recurrence.

Who Gets Endometriosis?

The outdated, misinformed theory that "white career women who delay childbearing" are the prime candidates for endometriosis could not be further from the truth. The disease knows no racial or socioeconomic barriers. It can affect any woman of reproductive age, from as early as a girl's first menstrual period. Endometriosis is also commonly found in women who have undergone hysterectomies and post-menopausal women [studies have shown that endometriosis implants produce their own estrogen and thrive even if all other hormone-producing organs are removed or non-functional] .

My story... in a very large nutshell

2007-07-12T10:35:00.000-07:00

I don't care... I'm going to talk about it

I know there's a lot of people that don't like to talk about "women's issues". It makes them squirm as they frantically search for an opportunity to change the subject. That's probably the reason why I'd never heard of endometriosis before I was diagnosed in 2005. That's why so many women suffer from this disease in silence and/or ignorance. Well, guess what... I don't care. I'm going to talk about it!

What is endometriosis?
Click here to find out

A not-so-brief history of my life once I became "a woman"

I started menstruating at 14 1/2 years old and almost immediately suffered severe cramps. But since the other women in my family did too, I was told is was "normal".

As I aged into my 20's, my cycles got shorter and my flow got heavier. The pain was excruciating (often at a 9 or 10 on a scale of 1 to 10). I learned large doses of ibuprofen would dull the pain enough that I could rock myself into a fitful sleep and just sleep the pain away. Needless to say, I did a lot of sleeping every month.

By my late 20's, I was beginning to have odd pain in my right shin bone that would radiate through my leg. I went to see my general practitioner about that. Lots of tests were run, but no conclusive diagnosis could be reached. On the advice of my GP, I went to see an OB/GYN who diagnosed me with severe PMS and put me on birth control pills.

I got married in my early 30's. We immediately started trying to get pregnant so I went off the birth control pills. Year after year went by with no success. In the meantime, I was having increasing pressure in my lower abdomen and pelvic region in addition to the intense pain with my periods. There were days I couldn't stand up straight.

During the rest of the month, I felt like my uterus was blowing up like a slowly inflating balloon. My former OB/GYN had left her practice, so I went to another one who told me I couldn't possibly be feeling the sensations I was describing. She inferred that I was imagining things and wanted to put me on birth control again. Not helpful. That was the first and last time I saw her.

I persevered on knowing I wasn't imagining things but was at a loss for answers.

In 2003 (just before our 5th wedding anniversary) we got our fondest wish--a positive pregnancy test. All the blood tests and doctor's appointments were scheduled. I was excited because I was going to finally get the OB/GYN who had a stellar reputation in our community--such a reputation, in fact, that she only took patients with a positive pregnancy test.

My first blood tests showed my progesterone levels as extremely low so I was immediately prescribed progesterone cream to prevent losing the pregnancy and was classified as a "high risk pregnancy".

When it came time for the first ultrasound (something we had envisioned as being a wonderful bonding experience with us getting to see the heartbeat for the first time), my doctor was out of the office so it had to be performed by one of her colleagues. He noted that my uterus had a weird shadow on it, and he couldn't find a heartbeat this early. He mumbled that I must have miscalculated how far along I was. *sigh*

A second ultrasound with my own doctor went even worse than the first with her using insensitive language right off the bat. Just a note to anyone who cares, phrases like, "Well, this may not be a viable pregnancy..." aren't very good bedside manners when dealing with a high-risk pregnancy and a couple that has only been able to get pregnant once in 5 years.

I made an appointment with another doctor for a second opinion.

Before even seeing me, the second doctor ordered another ultrasound (this one performed by an ultrasound tech at an imaging facility). I wasn't going to get the results until I met with my doctor at our first visit. The day before my scheduled appointment at 13 weeks along, I started showing signs that I was having a miscarriage. A phone call to the doctor's office resulted in the advice, "Since she has an appointment tomorrow, just have her keep that appointment and we'll see her then." I miscarried at home--painfully and traumatically. The next day I went to my appointment. No one had noted on my file that we'd called to say I was miscarrying. So in the midst of hormonal chaos I had to explain repeatedly that I'd lost the pregnancy the day before to every disinterested member of the office staff.

The doctor saw me. She said I was fine. She didn't like the progesterone cream I'd been put on because it was a brand from Europe and a name she didn't know. She thought that may have contributed to the loss of the pregnancy. She ended our appointment with, "You can start trying again in 6 weeks."

I never had another positive pregnancy test again.

I don't care... I'm going to talk about diarrhea too

In the spring of 2005, I began to have digestive problems (that's code for "diarrhea"). The issues got progressively worse. I went to my OB/GYN with my concerns, because my Grammy (maternal grandmother) died from ovarian cancer. I wasn't going to mess around anymore. This was too serious to be dismissed again. I forced the issue by telling her that my symptoms were too much like my Grammy's were prior to her ovarian cancer diagnosis. My doctor ordered a full ultrasound.

The first ultrasound revealed that I had an ovarian cyst. Finally! Something someone else could see that didn't belong there! Hallelujah! I wasn't crazy!

My doc put me on a month of hormone therapy (birth control pills) to see if the cyst would shrink. After a month, another ultrasound was ordered. The second ultrasound revealed that the cyst hadn't shrunk... it had grown! It was now the size of a racquetball. The ultrasound also found a second odd-shaped oblong cyst (cysts are usually round). That one was the size of a Snickers bar and completely baffled my doctor.

The Halloween that changed my life

By October (a month after my 39th birthday), it became clear that I would have to have surgery to have the cysts removed. Laparoscopic out-patient surgery was scheduled for the morning of Halloween 2005. I was going to spend Halloween "under the knife"--kind of ghoulishly appropriate, I thought.

Three days before my surgery, I met with my doc for my last pre-op appointment. I asked her how likely it would be that the cysts would came back. She said it was highly likely. Out of the blue I asked, "Wouldn't it be best to remove my ovaries completely because of the history of ovarian cancer in my family?" She was stunned, took a second to regroup, and then advised me that if I chose that route, I should have a full hysterectomy so I wouldn't be at risk for uterine cancer (apparently, risk increases when the progesterone levels drop after ovary removal). I felt strongly that a full hysterectomy was the right way to go. She was still a bit stunned (so was my husband who was also at the appointment). My doc made some phone calls and scheduled the operating room necessary for the more involved surgical procedure. Instead of an out-patient surgery, I would be in the hospital for 5 days. But the surgery was still planned for Halloween.

Interestingly, when the surgery happened only a couple of days later it was very fortuitous that the operating room had been set up for a full hysterectomy. Here's why...

Once inside me, my doctor discovered that my reproductive organs were encased in adhesions (scar tissue). She immediately suspected endometriosis. Since endometriosis cannot be detected via ultrasound this was quite the "surprise". My uterus, fallopian tubes, and ovaries had become one mass encased in gnarled scar tissue. And the whole mass had adhered to the outside of my colon (hence, my digestive problems I'd been having). Scar tissue also encased my ureters (the small tubes leading from the kidneys to the bladder). The ovarian cysts that were detected via ultrasound were also due to endometriosis. My doc determined that I had at least 20+ years worth of damage from the disease that had gone undiagnosed all these years despite my pleas to at least 3 other doctors that I felt something was wrong.

Needless to say, surgery went twice as long it should have in order for my doc to remove as much as possible in the limited time she had. Blood transfusions in my blood type were unavailable so she had to do as much work as she could before I was in danger of bleeding out. She spent most of her time carefully removing the mass that was adhered to my colon without jeopardizing my colon. Although she had planned on a total hysterectomy (removal of uterus, ovaries, fallopian tubes and cervix), she chose to leave my cervix because the surrounding scar tissue was so bad she didn't want to run the risk of cutting my ureters.

I came out of surgery anemic and pale from loss of blood. My husband tried not to react when he saw me in post-op. He mentioned I was very pale. In my groggy state I said, "I decided to dress up as a ghost for Halloween." That's me... always trying to find something funny in every situation.

When I was told about what my doctor found and that biopsies had been sent to the lab to confirm it was endometriosis, my silent response was, "What's endometriosis?" In the days I spent in the hospital, my husband and I looked up everything we could find on the internet about endometriosis.

My surgical recovery went very well. In fact, I felt better 5 days after the surgery than I had felt just a week prior to surgery--that's how bad I felt before surgery.

After about 6 weeks of post-op recovery, I felt like I'd stepped into a whole new life that was finally free from the mysterious pain that had plagued me since I was 15 years old. I started to call my surgery my "Halloween Hysterectomy" and it became the milestone that I measured where my old life ended and my new life began.

My doctor told me I couldn't take any hormone replacement therapy (HRT) because there were any rogue endometriosis cells left in my abdomen, they would continue to feed off any estrogen in my body and go through the monthly cycle that the tissue of the uterine lining does. The internal bleeding and subsequent scarring would come back along with the pain. They'd wreak havoc on my body again. She also strongly advised me to lose weight with the reasoning that because body fat produces estrogen it could also increase my risk of recurrence.

Over the next 6-8 months as my body healed from the surgery, I realized that I never wanted to go back to that place that I had been in for 20+ years--"Endometriosis Hell".

Because of my doctor's advice, I mistakenly thought I was the sole deciding factor as to whether or not my endometriosis would come back. I didn't understand that I had a disease that has no real remedy except removing all the endometriosis (something my doctor hadn't been able to do). I also didn't know that regardless of whether I had ovaries or body fat pushing any hormones through my veins, the insidious endometriosis implants (what the rogue cells are called) have their own "life support systems" that they can feed off of to grow and wreak havoc.

I found WeightWatchers and embarked on a journey of educating myself about nutrition and how to eat for wellness. Initially, I lost 45 pounds and kept it off until the end of 2007. Then slowly, my body started to revolt against my efforts. Despite the significant lifestyle changes I had made, my health started to deteriorate again. In spring 2010 (almost 5 years since my surgery), my digestive issues were back. I felt the same sensation of feeling like a slowly inflating balloon was in my lower abdomen. My reprieve hadn't seemed to last very long.

Except one thing is very different this time around... I know what I'm fighting, and I know the enemy. It has a name. I can face all of this head on as long as I know. This is where my story begins again...

Follow the story of my second surgery chronologically by going to the links above in the sidebar at right -->

Top left: Me only a week and half before my surgery in 2005
Top right: Me in Dec 2007
Bottom: Me in Summer 2010 (almost 44 years old)